Finding the Happy Ending
by iwanttobeanonymous
Summary: Based on The One. [Spoiler Alert] What if Maxon wasn't shot but the other way around? What if America had a secret that she couldn't tell Maxon no matter what? Sorry, suck at summaries! ON HAITUS
1. Chapter 1

**This is my first try on fanfiction! English isn't really my first language so I hope you can forgive my grammar mistakes. lol. Hope you guys like it. Please review and tell me if you want a 2nd chapter! :) Not really a one-shot depends on the likes and reviews I have :))**

**Based on The One. I own nothing. All credits goes to the author Keira Cass.**

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It was all over even if I never wanted it to end. Maxon has given me so many chances to prove myself and yet I failed him every single time. I have broken his trust and promise. I really meant to tell him about Aspen but there wasn't any right time to tell him and now I've lost him. Because I couldn't find the RIGHT TIME.

I looked at Mary, Anne and Lucy all hyped up, and it pained me more. They look so sure, so excited that I was going to win this. They dressed me in a pearl-white dress that complimented my pale complexion. It had a little bit of train going on, making me look more like a royal—a queen. God, tell them America. Tell them you are not The One.

Lucy started painting my lips pale pink, making me look more lively and youthful. Anne then blushed my cheeks and pinned my hair so that it would cascade down my right shoulder. Mary then added small diamond earrings and my songbird necklace. When I looked at the mirror, I was stunned for a second. They have always made me look so beautiful even though I was born with such plain features but THIS. This is just perfect. I looked as if I was glowing, so innocent, and so pure. OK, I think I'm being vain now but it's just so—WOW. An image popped in my head: a blushing bride. My eyes suddenly darkened and I started to tear up which made my maids confused.

"Why are you crying, miss? Did you not like what we have done?" Anne said worriedly.

"No. No. It's perfect." I laughed will wiping my tears. "I just—I think it's perfect." I smiled to them. "Anyway, I think it's time for me to go… Thank you for everything you've done for me. I will be forever indebted to you guys."

"Don't say such words! We love doing this" Mary said honestly.

"We can't wait to make your wedding dress!" Lucy added.

I froze. "What's the problem, Miss America?" Anne questioned.

Should I tell them? They have the right to know… but I don't want to bring them down. I looked at each of them and said "don't get your hopes high. I don't think he'll choose me." Smiling weakly.

"Nonsense." They said in unison and laughing after.

"You're going to be fine, miss! The prince adores you. Our eyes don't lie. We know you both love each other." Anne added.

"Well. Just... uhm... don't expect too much. Things may turn out not the way you guys imagined it but thank you, nonetheless." I smiled.

* * *

-Maxon's POV-

_Beautiful._ That was all I could think of when America passed through the entrance and sat beside me. She looked at me with hopeful eyes and said. "I've read them. Your letters. Maxon, please don't do this. Please don't destroy our love." Our love? I was enraged. How could this goddess tell me such despicable words when all she had done is break me every opportunity she had.

Without realizing it I laughed cynically and spoke "I didn't know what I was thinking when I wrote those letters. Yes, they were for you but they mean nothing to me now. YOU mean nothing to me now."

When I came to my senses, I saw how hurt she was. Tears were starting to well up on her eyes. I've always hated when women cry, more especially when it's America. I wanted to hug her and say that I forgive her but the memory of her betrayal and dishonesty pulled me back to the cold person I was now. I was angry again. She did not have any right to cry when she was the one who damaged our relationship. "Don't make those fall." I said coldly looking at her teary eyes.

She looked at the ceiling and wiped her tears and back at me smiled weakly. _Beautiful._ "Good. Make sure you wear that all throughout the ceremony."

"I will." She whispered almost to herself.

"Don't try anything stupid. The losers tend to be overly dramatic. I want you out of the palace as soon as possible." I added, glancing at her slightly. She tensed up and looked down. "I'll be happy when you're gone."

* * *

-America's POV-

It hurt. Every word stung and stabbed through my heart. I knew I deserved it but I never thought Maxon could say such words to me. I looked down to my feet and pushed back my tears. Be strong, America.

When I was sure that I could hold my emotions once again, I looked into the crowd. All of them ecstatic. I saw Celeste waved at me and I waved back, smiling weakly. She suddenly looked worried and worded out 'Are you ok?'

I was about to answer back when a gun suddenly pointed at her and a bullet came through her head. She fell to the ground, lifeless. I screamed as palace guards started shouting out orders. Rebels started flooding in the entrance door. Everything happened so quickly. Bullets flying everywhere.

It was horrifying. I looked at Maxon as he also tried to comprehend what was happening. Kriss started crying which made Maxon snap back to reality. He moved her at his back so that she wouldn't get hit. Just when we were about to move a rebel came into view. He pointed his gun at Kriss and Maxon immediately shielded her.

No. No. No. NO! Without thinking, before the rebel could fully push the trigger I ran towards the direction of the bullet. It hit me in the abdomen. And before I could yell in pain another bullet came and hit my chest. I guess I was going to die but I am still happy, knowing that Maxon would be alive.

* * *

-Maxon's POV-

"America!" I shouted. I moved towards her body as one of the palace guards took out the devil who shot my love. "Why?!" I cried out "Why did you do that?!"

America opened her eyes and looked into mine. "Because I love you."

"No! You can't just do this to me! Please. Please. You—just can't do this to me." I choked. "Not when I decided to move on."

"Sorry. I just can't help it. I wanted you to live." She closed her eyes letting tears roll down her cheeks. "You're going to be a wonderful king."

"Hold on, America. Don't leave me."

"Hmm... didn't you just say you wanted me gone?" she teased.

How could she joke in such a situation.

"I never meant that! I never meant this to happen! I was so foolish America! I should have tried to understand you more. I shouldn't have made my insecurities get the better of me."

She looked at me and touched my cheeks. "It's going to be fine, Maxon. Don't cry anymore. We were both at fault. Would you forgive me?"

I chuckled while wiping my tears "Silly girl, of course I would." I looked into her eyes and said "Break my heart. Break it a thousand time if you like. It was yours to break anyways. Just—please stay with me, America." I started crying again.

She looked at me sadly. "I wish I was more honest with you. I wish I trusted you more. I wish I had said I loved you earlier."

"Me too. Me too. But it's ok now. We've learned our lessons. We can make up those mistakes when you get better." I said optimistically.

"She's a good person." I looked at her confused. "Kriss, I mean. She loves you so much. Maybe as much as I do. She's going to be a beautiful bride."

It took me a few seconds to realize what she meant. "Don't say that, America. I—".

"I'm thankful for having to meet you. So thankful to love you and be loved in return." Tears streaming down her pale face. She lifted her right arm to hug me and I hugged her back. Seconds after her arm fell down and everything after that was a blur.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you so much for the reviews! Not that confident about the second chapter but hope you guys like it :)**

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Emptiness. This is all I can feel right now. I looked around the room and saw Officer Leger trying to evacuate America's family into one of the safe rooms. He doesn't know. I felt my stomach knot. This is all his fault. If he just hadn't tried to get in between me and America, this wouldn't have happened. America wouldn't be dying right now. Yes. This is perfectly HIS fault. I laughed darkly. Who am I kidding? I really am turning into my father. When did I start becoming like this? This isn't Officer Leger's fault. It's mine.

_It's going to be fine, Maxon._ I snapped back into reality. What the hell am I thinking about? I don't have time for self-pitying. I need to get America to the royal medics. She— I can't just lose her. I can't bear imagining a world without her.

I surveyed the room quickly and spotted a palace guard shouting orders. I walked towards him and grabbed his shoulder so that he was facing me. "I need to get America to the royal hospital." I said desperately. Our eyes locked but instead of moving towards America, he took a step back.

"Sir, we need to get you and Lady Kriss in one of the safe rooms." He replied. Didn't he understand what I just said?

"Didn't you hear me? Get her to the royal hospital NOW!" I said angrily.

"But sir—"

"Are you disobeying a royal order?" I hissed.

"No, sir." He lifted America carefully. "Hey, you there! Get the prince and Lady Kriss into a safe room." He shouted to another guard.

"Only Kriss." I said moving towards America's side. "I'm coming with you."

"But—" I glared. "Yes, sir."

"Prince Maxon, I am also coming with you." Kriss intervened.

I looked at her softly. "You can't, my dear. America is already injured really badly, I can't afford to put you into the same position." She pursed her lips and nodded. When I turned around and was about to start walking towards the opposite direction, she ran towards me and hugged me at my back.

"Promise me you'll be safe."

"Of course, my dear." I replied without looking back and started walking away.

* * *

-America's POV-

I opened my eyes into nothingness. I lifted my head to survey the area but all I could see was pitch black. I then stood up and started walking but as I was about to take my fifth step I suddenly felt a jolt of pain rip through my chest and abdomen. I fell down and gasped for air. Everything started to hurt. I curled into a ball, hugging my legs, trying to ease the excruciating pain I was feeling.

'Where am I?' I thought. I remember I was in a room when the rebels started flooding in. I was sitting next to Maxon and Kriss. We were about to leave the place when a rebel obstructed us and pointed a gun at Kriss and then Maxon shielded her, and I—my eyes widened into realization. I'm dead? Tears started to form and I tried to push it back. I wasn't even able to say goodbye to my family. I thought about how they would take in such news. May would probably be the one who'd be devastated the most.

As I was pondering, I saw a light flickering from a distant. I looked up and saw a tunnel materialize. Is this it? I stood up and walked towards the light. Every step that I took forward made a bit of the pain I was feeling, subside. I didn't feel anything anymore when I was almost at the end of the tunnel. I was about to cross the section that divided darkness and light when a voice started calling out to me.

'_America, please stay.'_ The voice pleaded.

Who is that? _Why should I? _I thought angrily. If I stay here, there's nothing but pain and loneliness. I thought about the future I was never going to be in. My family would probably live a comfortable life as Threes. Aspen would probably have a family with Lucy while serving the royal family. Everyone was going to get their happy endings except for me.

'Don't go, please. I love you.' The voice whispered.

"Where is it coming from?" I asked myself.

I looked down at my feet and suddenly the ground started to crumble. Before I knew it I was pulled down into a small room. There were a lot of doctors and nurses inside the room. I saw Maxon pacing back and forth.

"Your Highness, we think it's better to leave the room." One of the doctors said.

"No. I am staying right here with America." Me? What does he mean? I'm right here.

"Alright, your highness but would you please move to the side?"

"Very well" Maxon said and scooted to a corner but still having full view of the person lying on the table.

Wanting to know who that person was, I started walking towards him/her. My eyes widened into shock as I realized who it was. There I was, lying in the steel table. I looked really pale. Well, I always looked pale but this was different. I looked like a corpse. My whole body was covered in blood. My beautiful white dress tainted in crimson.

I was about to touch my body when I was pulled back into the abyss. I was now inside a dark tunnel. One end leading towards the light and the other leading towards the medical room. I needed to make yet another choice. If I go back, things will still be complicated. I would still hurt. Maxon would probably still have chosen Kriss even after forgiving me… I just can't live in uncertainty anymore. I looked at the light and I knew it promised me peace and tranquility. I knew where I wanted to be. I sighed and started walking.

* * *

-Maxon's POV-

'I'm losing her.' was the only thing I could think of. I felt so hopeless and angry. I've always said I was going to make her happy and protect her but here she was dying. In the end, she was the one who protected me. What kind of a man am I? Princes' were supposed to save the day but here I am so helpless; not being able to do anything but pray.

"She's going into cardiac arrest!" One of the doctors said. "Get me the defibrillator!" Oh. God. NO!

"One, two, three!"

"Still nothing, doctor."

"Again."

"One, two, three!"

_Beeeeeeeeeeeeeep._

"Let's try again."

"One, two, three!"

"Negative."

One of the nurses ran to me. "Sir, we are trying our best to revive her but her condition is just too—" before she could finish her sentence I ran towards America.

"You can't do this to me!" I cried out. "Are you going to break my heart once again?" I couldn't feel my legs anymore. I fell down leaning against a wall. I looked at one of the doctors desperately. _I just can't give up. _"Just one more time, Please? I'm begging you." I pleaded.

The doctor sighed and nodded. I stood up and looked at America. "Just one more try, America." I whispered, kissing her on her forehead.

I moved out of the doctor's way as he prepared the defibrillator once again.

I closed my eyes. My blood running cold. Please. Please. Just this once.

"Here we go. One, two, three!"

Beeeeeeeeeeeep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

"It worked." A nurse said.

"How is this possible? We were so sure… This is a miracle." The doctor sighed in relief.

"Is she going to be ok?" I asked.

"For now. We still have a lot to do but I assure you she's going to live, Prince Maxon." The doctor replied. "I would advise that you take your rest, prince. As much as we want you to be by her side, we can't have you here any longer."

"I understand." I took one last glance at America before I left the room. 'She's going to be ok' I smiled to myself. "I'll never let her go again."

* * *

-Meanwhile-

"Doctor, should we tell him about her condition?"

"No. It's not in our position to tell him but hers."


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you so much for the reviews! It really motivates me to write :)) Hope you guys like this chapter!**

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-America's POV-

"She still hasn't woken up yet…"

"Let's run another test. Can you…."

"Do you think it's because…"

"When she went into cardiac arrest, she…"

"…also she can't... too tragic."

I was hearing murmurs. I heard bits of conversation but somehow I couldn't comprehend what they were saying. After a few minutes of trying to understand what was going on, I gave up and just let myself be engulfed in darkness once again.

I remember being in a tunnel. I was going towards somewhere but I couldn't remember which direction. Come on, America, try to remember. I was heading… to the right? No, I was heading somewhere else. I was heading towards the _light_. I remember now. I made a decision. I was done with living and so I headed towards the light but then I heard a voice. Maxon's voice.

'_Are you going to break my heart once again?'_ hearing his voice so desperate and broken, made me stop from my tracks and made me realize that I didn't want to die just yet. I'm incredibly stupid for even choosing the easy way out.

What would heaven be to me, if Maxon wasn't there? No matter how serene and pleasant the other side is, the person I love won't be there which is why I must go back. Even if he doesn't want me anymore. Even if he doesn't love me anymore. Even if it was Kriss that he'd choose. I'd rather be hurt than live in a world where he didn't exist. I can bear any pain, loneliness and rejection, as long as I knew he was there: safe and happy. I love him and that's what all that mattered to me.

I started walking away from the light and into to the other end of the tunnel. I breathed in and out, calming myself before I finally went through the tunnel.

* * *

-_still_ America's POV-

I opened my eyes to the sight of a ceiling fan. I lifted my head up and looked around. There was a breathing device attached to me and some tubes and wires. Wires… to read brain activity, I guess? I suddenly felt dizzy so I laid my head back on the pillow.

I was in a rather spacious room. Bigger than our house in Carolina. The walls were painted white. There was a couch facing my bed and a television at my right side while all the medical machines were positioned to my left. It was too clean in here for my taste. The smell of disinfectants made my nose cringe in disgust. 'America, who gets sick of cleanliness? Only you' I sighed.

I looked at the ceiling fan and watched it spin. I was about to fall asleep when the door opened. Maxon? I leaned a little bit to get a better look. To my disappointment it was just a nurse who in return looked at me with bewilderment.

"You—you're awake?!" The nurse gasped.

"Uhmm… I guess?" I said while removing the breathing mask or whatever it was. I attempted to sit up again but my head felt really heavy.

"Don't move, Lady America… You're still under strong medication so you might feel a little lightheaded. I—I'm going to get the doctor." The nurse hurried away.

I nodded and watched her as she ran out the door. When I couldn't hear her steps anymore I carefully rolled to my side and closed my eyes.

"Are you sure she's awake?" I heard someone say from outside of the room.

"Yes, sir. When I entered the room she was just staring at me." What am I now, a pervert?

The door opened wide and a grey-haired male wearing a long white coat came in. The doctor I assumed. The nurse came after looking a bit breathless from running. The doctor looked at me and so I looked back.

"Miss Singer, welcome back." He said, giving me a warm smile.

"uhh… Thank you?" I replied rather awkwardly.

"I'm Doctor Matthew, by the way." He then went to my side and took a pen out from the pocket of his coat. The nurse then handed him a clipboard. "Your wounds are most probably healed by now. Do you feel anything weird? Something aching or stinging?"

"Not really but I can't seem to lift my head for a long time. I start feeling dizzy if I do." I replied.

"That's just perfectly normal, Miss Singer. You were out for some quite time so your body is trying to adjust."

_For some quite time?_ "How long was I out?" my voice sounding a little bit shaky.

"Three weeks and two days." He replied. That long?! "Anyways, we have to run a few test before we can discharge you. I know you might be sick of this room but we need to make sure that you are all ok. The tests would probably take 3 days."

"ok." It wasn't like I could do anything about it.

The doctor then looked at the clipboard and started flipping through the pages. It looked as if he was looking for something. He stopped when he reached halfway through the pages. He looked at me and cleared his voice. "There's something else—" before he could continue someone came rushing through the door.

"America?" It was Maxon. His voice sounding a bit hoarse. I looked at him with surprised eyes. He seems different from the Maxon I knew three weeks and some days ago. His hair was disheveled. His tie loose around his neck. His eyes looked tired and his body a bit thinner. He seems as if he aged a lot over the past few weeks. But even with these changes, I still loved him the same. My heart started to beat fast and loud. Before I knew it my shoulders started shaking and tears rolled down my cheeks.

"Maxon." I choked out as I pulled myself up the bed so that I was leaning against the headboard.

He ran towards me and hugged me tightly. I could feel his whole body trembling. I lifted my arms and placed them around his neck. I buried myself in his shoulders. Those weeks that we'd lost, felt like forever. I couldn't stop myself from crying out and so did Maxon. We didn't care how stupid or inappropriate we were in front of the doctor and nurse. I lifted my head up so that I could see Maxon's eyes. He looked down at me and brushed away the hair that covered my face. He cupped his hands on my face and leaned towards me so that our noses were touching.

"I thought I was going to lose you forever." He whispered. His lips brushing mine.

"Me also." I breathed out. I could hear the door closing as Maxon's lips met mine.

The kiss was quick and faint at first. Maxon's lips trembled against mine. It was as if he was scared to go any farther; like any moment I would disappear from him if he wasn't careful enough. I started to deepen the kiss, reassuring him that it was ok; that I wasn't going to break that easily.

"Do you know how much I love you?' he said in between kisses.

"I'm not sure... Tell me." I whispered, giggling slightly.

He looked into my eyes and grinned quite evilly. "I'll show you."

Shivers went from the back of my spine and into my whole body. Maxon gave me one last chaste kiss when he pushed me down the bed. He took off his tie and shoes and threw it down the floor. He then positioned himself above me.

"You really don't know?" His lips only a few millimeters away from my ear.

"I—" before I could think of any smart remark he started kissing me. First at my jaws, then making his way down to my neck. I couldn't help but let out a moan. I could feel his smile on my neck. Oh, God, why did I do that? I blushed into a million shades of red. "Hey, you're not fair!" I pouted.

"Silly girl" He chuckled and then looked into my eyes. We were about to continue where we left off when somebody knocked at the door.

"Prince Maxon, as much as you want Lady America, I would advise that you hold on to what you were doing for another time. We need to verify first if Lady America is in perfect condition before she can do anything _strenuous_."

It was Maxon's turn to turn red.


	4. Chapter 4

**I've been updating everyday because of you guys! :)) Though I can't promise I'd be able to keep up my current pacing when schoolwork and my extra-curricular commitments start to pile up :'( I'll try my best to update, asap.**

**Anyways, thank you for all the reviews and support. Hope you guys like this chapter! I really enjoyed making this one! :))**

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-Maxon's POV-

I thought I was going to lose her, but here she was breathing and very much alive. I don't know how long I've been staring at her, I can't just help it. My father has always taught me to never lose to my emotions but this feeling—this love, is just unsurpassable. Well not that I was trying. She was too damn irresistible, I could barely stop myself from touching her. _'Maxon, what kind of a gentleman are you? She just woke up yesterday and you're already thinking of that.'_ I sighed. Sometimes I can't help but think I was a wolf in sheep's clothing.

I looked around the room and found a foldable chair. I moved it so that I could sit right beside America. She was sleeping soundly. 'How could someone be so beautiful even at sleep?' I thought. I was supposed to be doing paperwork right now but I can't bear to leave her. I'm too scared to leave this moment. What if this was just a dream? What if something happens? What if the rebels comes back? I can't stop being paranoid. Not when, I was so close to losing her.

"Hey, are you ok?" she said, rubbing her eyes.

"You're awake?" I said out of shock. 'What kind of a question is that, Maxon? You can be incredibly stupid at times.' I thought to myself.

America let out a chuckle. "Well,_ someone _kept staring at me."

I blushed furiously. 'How smooth, Maxon. She's probably going to think you're some kind of a pervert.'

"I— Th-There was nothing else to look at!" I stuttered. Saying the most unreasonable and incredibly ludicrous excuse I have ever formulated.

She looked at me with wide eyes for a second, but then started laughing heartily. _Beautiful._ The sound of her voice was music to my ears. I would humiliate myself again and again if that would make her laugh.

"That is the worst excuse I have ever heard in my life, Maxon Schreave." She said, still laughing.

I blushed yet another deeper shade of red. "If only I didn't love you…" I mumbled out.

"Come again?" she smiled smugly.

"I said…" An idea popped out that made grin. I stood up from the chair and moved towards her. She looked at me, confused. 'Payback time.' I mouthed and started tickling her.

"NO! Stop! Stop!" America shrieked. She was laughing so hard right now. I should have done this ages ago.

"MAXON! HAHAHA" She wriggled. "Stop! You're going to pay for this!" She said trying to look angry but failing miserably.

"hmm... I think I'd like that." I answered back.

"No! HAHAHA Seriously, stop!"

"What's the magic word?"

"You're hopeless!" she said while trying to get a hold of my hands.

"That's not the magic word." I said, playing innocent.

"please stop!" She let out.

"_Come again?"_

She looked at me as if saying 'Unbelievable'. I just smiled and continued tickling her.

"No! No! Maxon, please, I beg of you to stop!"

"With cherry on top?" I grinned.

"Yes!"

Satisfied with the outcome, I stopped tickling her. She scooted to the other side of the bed and glared at me. "You know, for a prince, you're pretty immature."

I raised my brows and smirked "Only to you."

She rolled her eyes and then rested on the bed once again. She looked really exhausted which made me feel a bit guilty.

"I'm starting to think you're a sadist." She said a bit whinny, rolling to her left so that her back was facing me. 'In normal circumstances, whining would probably irritate me but America defies all logic and reason. Even with her whining voice, all I could think of is how cute and irresistible she looked like.

I let out a sigh. I removed my shoes and crawled my way up to the bed and to her side. I lay down next to her and placed my arm around her waist. "I just can't help it. You make me do crazy things." I said sincerely, as I buried my head onto her neck, breathing her scent in.

We didn't move for a while. Only silence filled the room. After a few minutes, I could feel her breathe in deeply and out. She moved herself so that she was finally facing me again. She looked into my eyes and so did I. I wished this moment would last forever.

"What about Kriss?" She asked, looking down.

Wait, What? Is this girl serious?! Doesn't she know how madly in love I am with her? "Sometimes, you can also be incredibly stupid. Haven't I shown and SAID that you're the one I love? What proof do you want more, in order to believe me?!" I said, placing my index finger underneath her chin, lifting her head a bit so that our eyes met. "You've always been my pick, America."

I leaned forward so that our lips would meet. We started out slow and gentle, like we were trying to reassure where our relationship stood. I then bit her lower lips teasingly, making her moan and open her mouth. I can't help but adore her. I slid my tongue into her mouth, tasting every bit of her. If only we didn't need to breathe, I would have never stopped. No matter how much we kissed and touched, I just can't get enough of her.

"That was amazing." She panted, still gasping for air.

Hearing her say those words made me blush.

"It would have been perfect if we weren't doing it in a hospital." She laughed out and then looked at me again. "I'm just so tired of this room."

"You know what Doctor Matthew said. Just a few more days." I let her rest on my shoulder.

"I know..." she let out.

"Once you're discharged we can go to all the places you want to go to." I offered. Seeing her like this made my heart ache. I wish I could do something for her. I suddenly thought of an idea. "I know a place."

"What?" her face stricken with confusion.

I stood up and went to the door, opening it slightly. I surveyed the area, seeing if the coast was clear. "What time does the nurse comes to check up on you?" I asked.

"Uhm… 2 hours from now. Why?" She replied, still sporting a confused look.

"I have an idea." I grinned. I got my phone and called Mary to help do me a favour. 15 minutes later she was outside the room carrying a bag of clothes.

"Thank you." I mouthed.

"I'm glad to help, Prince Maxon. We can't wait for Lady America to come back to the castle." She smiled.

"Me also." I smiled back, watching her leave the hallway before I closed the door once again.

"Who was that?" America asked looking at me then towards the bag I was carrying.

"Later. You have to wear this first." I handed her the bag.

"What for?"

"We're going to sneak out." I beamed.

She looked at me with astonishment and then started laughing. "You're incredible."

"I know" I said quite smugly, smirking at the end.

"And I don't mean in a good way." She added, rolling her eyes at me. "Turn around, I'm going to change." And so I did.

"No peeking." She added.

"Yes, mam." I replied.

"Done."

"Ready?"

"Yep"

"Let's go." My eyes glistering with mischief.

* * *

-still Maxon's POV-

We snuck out to a garden near the hospital. There was a picnic blanket lying on the ground while a picnic basket sat on top of it.

"How?" She asked.

"I'm the prince remember." She rolled her eyes at me. I offered my left hand, which she took, and led her towards the blanket and sat down. I took out the sandwiches from the picnic basket. I poured down fresh orange juice into two small paper cups.

"Here." I gave America a piece of sandwich and the orange juice.

"Thanks." She took I bite and I swear upon my heart that she actually shivered in delight. I looked down at my food. 'Is the sandwich really that good?' I pondered.

America seemed to have read my mind and said "I'm sorry. It just felt like ages since I've eaten something good. I've been out for so long and the hospital food tasted disgusting."

"Then eat as much as you want." I chuckled, taking out more sandwiches from the basket.

After eating our fill we went to sit down under a shade of a tree. I was about to doze off when America suddenly threw a caterpillar at me. I gasped in surprise and flung my arms. When the caterpillar was out of sight, I glared at America. It wasn't like I was scared of bugs or the like but I don't appreciate people trying to startle me, especially when I'm sleeping. She stuck her tongue out, trying to provoke me. 'So this is how you like to play it huh?' I grinned.

I stood up and caught a beetle. She knew what I was going to do and so she stood up. Before she could escape I threw the beetle at her. I didn't expect that it would go inside her clothes but it did. She started screaming so I ran towards her and helped her out.

Once the beetle was out of her clothes she gave me a menacing look but she ended up looking like a child who tried to look angry. She might have sensed that she looked ridiculous because she also started laughing.

"You're going to pay for this, Maxon Schreave!"

"If you can catch me." I challenged.

"Oh, I can." She grinned evilly and I took off.

After only running for about 20 seconds I couldn't hear her footsteps anymore. 'Did I ran too fast?' I though and so I turned around.

My blood ran cold. No. No. No. No. "America!" I shouted out, running towards her as fast as I could.

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_Note: No insect/bug was harmed in the process of making this chapter :p_


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry for the wait! Finally, the chapter you guys have been waiting for… hopefully (Hey there Mockingjay04 :)) )! **

** piepie1289 Let's say I was going for 'the calm before the storm' :)). **

** DaughterofSea Oh I find your reviews really adorable and heart-warming! Thank you! :**

**Anyway, hope you guys enjoy this. Please comment if you can! :) btw, not sure if I would be able to update soon. Just keep on tab.**

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-America's POV-

'When did this man start acting like a child?' I thought to myself. I watched him as he ran without a care in the world, his eyes filled with mischief and trouble. 'Yep, definitely a kid.' I know I should be annoyed right now but I could never bring myself to, even if I tried. I couldn't help but think how adorable and cute he was acting. He was always so serious and mature during The Selection. Seeing him like this puts a smile on my face. I am the only one who knew about this side of him. He trusted me this much to show his vulnerable side.

I grinned and started running after him but after only running for ten seconds I suddenly felt a jolt of pain ran through my upper body. It felt like something was tearing my organs apart. I fell down to the ground and writhed in pain. It was too much to bear. I started gasping for air but the pain was all I and my body could think of. I heard Maxon screaming out my name before I finally blacked out.

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-Maxon's POV-

'Oh God. This is all my fault. I knew. I knew she wasn't ok yet but I still encouraged her to run.' I couldn't stop my tears from falling down. I paced back and forth outside the ER. I stopped at a wall and punch it out of anger and frustration. "Dammit, Maxon, Why did you have to act so carelessly?" I gritted through my teeth. Every tick of the clock felt like an eternity. I sat down at one of the hospital chairs along the hallway.

After 2 hours of torture, a nurse came out. I quickly stood up and ran towards her, meeting her halfway.

"How is she?" I let out.

"Nothing to worry about, Prince Maxon. She's in a stable condition now."

"Thank you so much." I said. Truly grateful for the news.

"You don't have to thank me." The nurse smiled. "Lady America sure is a fighter."

"Yeah, she is." I smiled, recalling the time when she kicked me on my crotch.

"As much as I want to keep you company, Prince Maxon, I need to head somewhere." The nurse said apologetically.

"No, no, it's ok." I moved to the side so that she could pass through. She mouthed a thank you and went her way.

When she finally disappeared to the corner of the hallway, I let out a sigh of relief. 'She's going to be ok.' I thought. My body suddenly felt tired and worn out. I walked towards the chair I was sitting on earlier and leaned upon it, letting my head be supported by the wall. My eyes started to feel really heavy. I fought out the exhaustion but lost. Seconds later, I could feel my body giving into sleep.

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-America's POV-

I woke up to the sight of blinding lights. There were doctors surrounding me. I saw Doctor Matthew scribbling something on a clipboard.

"She's awake!" one of the other doctors said. Doctor Matthew looked up and nodded.

"It's been a long day, gentlemen. You can go and rest. I still need to tell something to Miss Singer." He said while removing his surgical mask and gloves. The doctors nodded in agreement and bid their farewells as they exited the door. I watched as each of them go, then looked at Doctor Matthew.

"Miss Singer, I'm starting to think that you like the hospital." Doctor Matthew joked. I pushed myself up to the headboard so that I was leaning against it, then shook my head.

"Well, what you did a while ago with Prince Maxon was pretty risky. It was a good thing that I went to your room an hour earlier and saw you gone. We immediately searched for the two of you. Luckily, we found you before it was too late." He then moved away to get some folders from a table across the room.

"What happened to me?" I asked.

"As I said earlier you can't do strenuous activities. Your body is still healing. When you ran after Maxon, your body wasn't able to take the physical strain of running." He sighed and then opened the folders, flipping through the papers inside.

"Uhm… thank you." I looked down at the blanket, organizing my thoughts. "You said earlier you went to my room an hour earlier. Why?"

"Oh yes." He looked up. "I've been meaning to tell you something ever since you woke up but circumstances always seem to prevent me to. I went to your room because I was going talk to you about it but I found you missing. Miss Singer, you really gave the whole hospital staff a scare."

"I—I'm sorry." I mumbled, nodding apologetically.

"It's ok. It was a careless mistake. I hope you and Prince Maxon learned a lesson. You did, right?" he looked at me in the eyes.

"I certainly did." I said placing my hands on my lap.

"Very well then." He put on his reading glasses and looked at the folders he was holding. "As I was saying, I needed to inform you about something. Earlier I said that your body can't take the physical strain from running, didn't I?"

"Uh… yes. Is—is that going to be a permanent thing?" I asked, my voice shaky.

"Oh no, of course not. Don't worry about that, you can run or do other physical routines/activities over the course of time." He reassured. "What I am concerned about is your relationship with Prince Maxon."

I looked at him, confusion plastered all over my face. 'What is this doctor saying? Why the hell would he be concerned with my relationship with Maxon? Is he some kind of counsellor now?'

"You know very much that Prince Maxon will be the one next in throne?"

I nodded, still confused about where this is leading to.

"And I assume that you are the one he has chosen from The Selection. Am I right?"

"Yes? I—I thinks so." I mumbled out. "I'm confused. How is this related to my health?"

"I'm going to cut through the chase, Miss Singer. The thing is, when you got shot in your abdominal area it wasn't just your stomach that was damaged." He looked at me. "But also your reproductive organs."

I froze. It felt like my heart stopped beating. "Are you telling me, I won't be able to have children?" I mastered out.

He sighed and took his glasses off. "No, nothing that definite but based on the information we collected, the result shows that there's only a slim chance of you getting pregnant."

"But I still can get pregnant, right?" I asked desperately.

"As I said the chances are slim but yes you still have the capability of getting pregnant."

I sighed a breath of relief.

"BUT—you cannot **bear** a child."

"I'm confused." I really am.

"There is still a chance that you can get pregnant, as I said numerous times. But let's say you were able to get pregnant. Your body has become too fragile to be capable of carrying a child within it." He massaged his forehead and put his glasses back on. "Earlier when you fainted, it's because you put your body in a strenuous position. Over time your body will be able to do those physical activities without having any complications. But pregnancy, is a different thing. It strains your body for MONTHS. Pregnancy is already a risk for any woman but for a woman like you who have received serious internal damages the risks are incredibly high."

He looked at me. "There's a small chance of you being able to survive the pregnancy period and the chances of you surviving child birth, we cannot say. Do you understand now?"

"Yes." I replied meekly, trying to digest everything he said.

"This leads us to your relationship with Prince Maxon." He looked straight into my eyes. "I have principles and morals that I abide to, which is why I haven't told him about your condition. I am giving you the chance to personally tell him about it. I know that this is something that Prince Maxon should hear from your mouth and not from mine. Miss Singer, do you understand?"

I was too emotional to answer.

"He will be KING. He needs a wife that is perfectly healthy and capable of giving him an _heir_. And sadly, you're very far from that." He sighed. "I like you, Miss Singer. I was actually, rooting for you to win The Selection." He said, giving me an honest smile. "But that can no longer happen."

"I—I understand." Tears started rolling down my cheeks which eventually turned to heavy sobs. 'Why is this happening? All I ever wanted was Maxon.'

"I'm truly sorry, Miss Singer." He started walking towards the door. "I have faith that you will tell him but if I ever come to know that you didn't and become engaged to him, I have no choice but to be the one who'll tell him about it." He sighed. "Goodnight, Miss Singer."

My world started falling apart once again.


	6. Chapter 6

**I can never thank you enough for all your reviews! Making this chapter was a real struggle for me, and finishing it on time was even harder. I hope you guys like this! *fingers crossed***

**P.S. Out of all the speculation you've had about America's condition, what stood out for me the most was the recurring one, wherein you guys thought that America was pregnant. Though I would have loved that she was, they haven't even done it yet! Even in the books, right? So I was just kind of boggled that you thought about it.**

**btw, am I being too explicit with the romance scenes? Should I mellow it down? Hahah my friends told me that the ones I've made were already for rated M? :))**

EileenAbbey- Thanks for the info! Will try to fix it! I'm quite oblivious when it comes to those things (medical/health matters) so I'm really thankful for telling me.

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I was sleeping lightly when I felt someone's hand tracing my face, as if trying to memorize it. I caught the intruder's hand and opened my eyes. It was America. I quickly stood up and pulled her towards me. "I thought I was going to lose you."

She hugged me back, placing her forehead against my chest and shook. "I—uhm. Of course not." She looked at me and smiled weakly. I couldn't help but kiss her. Cupping her face, I molded our lips together. It felt amazing how our lips fit so perfectly, like we were made for each other. She kissed me more deeply—more hungrily, which had surprised me a little bit. It was usually me who took the initiative. I moaned against hers lips and kissed her back. I pulled away so that we could catch on with our breath.

I looked at her dazed eyes. She was so beautiful. How can someone be born into perfection? I knew the day that I first met her, that she will be the one who would steal my heart. When she offered her companionship to me that faithful night in the garden, I accepted it, thinking I'd be able to win her. Even though she said she only wanted me as a friend, I've always longed—wanted for more. When I've learned about her and Officer Ledger's relationship, it made me realize how deep my feelings ran and I got scared. No matter how many times she broke my heart, my trust and my whole being, I was still madly in love with her; I could never truly hate her, which is why I tried running away. I thought that if I chose Kriss, these feelings would go away but it didn't.

I love her. I love her so much. I just can't help but love everything about her, even her flaws and imperfections. I moved closer again so that we were only breaths apart. "Marry me." I whispered against her lips and kissed her once again. I suddenly felt her trembling. I broke the kiss and moved a little bit backwards so that I could look at her face. She bit her lower lips while tears streamed down her face, and then looked away from me.

"What's the matter, my love?" I asked, my voice filled with worry as I started panicking inside my head.

"W—We need to stop this." She said, her voice shaky. I didn't understand what she meant. Stop what? Did I kiss her too hard? Did the doctor say that was part of the 'strenuous' things she couldn't do?

"What do you mean?" I asked in confusion.

She wiped her tears away, sniffed, and looked at me, straight in the eyes. Somehow, her eyes looked distant "I can't marry you."

"Wa- WHY?" my voice cracked. My stomach felt like there were rocks in it. I think I'm going to get sick.

"I just can't, Maxon." She said sadly, her eyes looking helpless. "I don't think I love you enough to marry you."

My eyes widened in shock. Anger and dejection started to build up in me. I couldn't stop myself from shaking. "HOW COULD YOU?" I said, closing my eyes; trying to calm myself down.

"How could you play with me like this?" I cried out, looking at her while trying to push back the tears that have formed in my eyes. "You said you LOVED me! SO—so, so MANY times." Recalling all the times she kissed me, embraced me, touched me and said she loved me.

She just kept quiet which made me even angrier. How can she be like this, when I feel like I am DYING inside right now?!

"So you were lying all this time? All those times that you said you loved me and would fight for me, were lies? You really had me fooled, America." I laughed cynically. "You're WORSE than my father."

She froze. She was about to say something but held it in. "I'm so sorry, Maxon." She said, turning away from me.

"You're not." I said darkly, watching her walk farther and farther away from me.

When she finally was out of my sight, I slumped on one of the hallway chairs. I placed my elbows on my knees, letting my head be supported by my hands as I stared down the floor. I tried to process everything that had happened.

'Where did I go wrong?' I thought angrily. I thought I knew HER but obviously I didn't. She appeared to me like an angel, when in reality she was the antithesis.

I changed my sitting position and leaned against the backrest of the chair. I curled my hands into tight fists and let go. I closed my eyes and recalled those happy memories I've had with her. Those times we tugged our ears. Those times that we kissed. Those times that we just stared into each other. Those times we shared about our fears, dreams and aspirations.

'_**When did the lie start?**_' I thought.

I stood up and started walking when I bumped into Doctor Matthew.

"Prince Maxon, good evening." He smiled. I couldn't bring myself to talk, so I just nodded and continued on walking.

"Oh wait, Prince Maxon!" He ran towards me and handed me a small brown envelope. "Here. I thought you'd want to keep this as a memento when Lady America saved your life. I got a hold of it only now, because the security had to inspect them."

"Uh… Thanks." I said, not really listening to what he said. I took the envelope, bid my goodbye and continued on walking.

As I was about to open the door that led to the lobby of the hospital, I accidentally dropped the brown envelope. I sighed and picked it up, top down, making the contents of it fall to the ground.

'What the hell are these?' I thought. Picking up small pieces of metal. I studied it and came to realize they were bullet remains. 'Why would Doctor Matthew give me bullets?' I thought. My eyes widened to further realization. 'These were the bullets that hit America.'

And suddenly, I recalled that day when she used herself to shield me from the bullets of a rebel that tried to kill me. 'This doesn't make any sense at all!' I thought. Why would she risk her life for me if she didn't love me?

It all suddenly clicked. 'MAXON, you truly are stupid. The LYING started when she said that she didn't love you enough to marry you.'

But why would she lie to me?

What benefit will she get from this?

"There must be a reason." I said to myself. I took one last look at the envelope and slid it in my pocket. I turned around and started running.

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-America's POV-

When I was sure that I was already out of Maxon's sight, I started running to my room. When I got there I immediately shut the door, crawled my way into the bed and started crying.

"I couldn't... I couldn't tell him." I cried out.

"How can I tell him if, I, myself couldn't accept this condition of mine." I said, laughing cynically.

I didn't know how long I cried, but I just did. When my eyes were all out of tears, I stared into the ceiling fan.

"I love you, Maxon." I whispered. "Yes, I've always wanted to marry you."

The door suddenly opened and I saw Maxon standing in front of me.

"Then what's holding you back?" He asked.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hi guys! Sorry wasn't able to update yesterday! A lot of things came up, and I was stuck at school. My update-everyday streak is finally over! :'( I think I won't be able to update as often anymore.**

**Anyway, hope you enjoy this chapter. Not actually that confident about it.**

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"_I love you, Maxon." I whispered. "Yes, I've always wanted to marry you."_

_The door suddenly opened and I saw Maxon standing in front of me. _

"_Then what's holding you back?" He asked._

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-America's POV-

My eyes widened in shock. Maxon went closer to my bed and looked down to me. His breathing was heavy and his face full of sweat. I sat up and looked at him. "M-Maxon. Why are you here?" I stuttered, and then bit my quivering lips.

"Answer the god damn question, America!" He shouted. "What's holding you back?" His voice desperate.

I closed my eyes, letting my tears fall down. I shook my head and looked at him, my eyes starting to brim with tears again. I can't do it. I'm just not ready yet. "Please. Just not now, Maxon." I pleaded.

"Don't you trust me?" He said, his eyes filled with hurt.

"I DO, Maxon."

"Why then?" He paused. "Why can't you tell me?"

"I—I can't"

"You can't or you WON'T?"

"Please, Maxon. Let's just stop this!" I cried out.

"Damn it, America. Why do you make things complicated?! Why can't you just tell me the bloody truth?" He ran his right hand through his hair and started pacing back and forth. "What do you take me for, then?!"

"Please, just understand."

"Understand what, America?! You won't even say anything! What the hell will I UNDERSTAND!" His voices rising after every sentence.

"I don't know…" I looked down at my lap.

"You DON'T know?" He said with disbelief and started laughing cynically. "You have to think of a better excuse, America." His voice strained, as he looked straight at me. "I won't leave until YOU tell me, what the HELL is going on with you."

I started feeling angry. Why can't he just let me be? Why was he so bloody intrusive? Why does he have to be so damn insensitive? I'm the one who's been hurting the most, why can't he understand that?! "IT'S NOT YOUR GOD DAMN CONCERN, MAXON!" I shouted.

"IT IS, AMERICA! The moment I met you, everything about you has become 'MY GOD DAMN CONCERN!'"

"I DIDN'T TELL YOU TO MAKE IT YOUR GOD DAMN CONCERN. If you're so tired of me, why don't you just walk away?" I hissed. I shut my eyes closed, tears streaming down my face.

"America—"

"Just go AWAY!" I glared at him and then turned my head to the other side so that I wasn't facing him.

"I won't."

I looked at him as he stood, unmoving. Why does this guy have to be so stubborn! I got up the bed and stomped towards him. I shoved him, and tried to push him away but he wouldn't budge. "Move! Damn it!" I cried out.

"No."

"YOU—" before I could finish what I was about to say he crashed his lips to mine. My eyes widened in shock and my brain stopped functioning for a second. When I came back to my senses I started pushing him and slapping his chest. He looked hard at me and moved his lips away. I thought he had finally stopped but instead he carried me in his arms where I squirmed and kicked in vain. He walked towards the bed and dropped me. I tried to get up but he pushed me back and trapped me with his body. He stared at me, making me feel self-conscious.

"Tell me what's wrong." He commanded.

"Unbelievable! Is this how you're going to treat those who disagrees with you, once you're king?" I retorted, glaring at him.

His eyes looked hurt. I suddenly felt disgusted with myself. Why do I always hurt the people I love? Why is to so hard to tell the truth?

"Aren't you tired of fighting?" He asked.

"I am, Maxon." I sighed. His question ran deeper to me than to what he actually meant.

"Why then?"

"I—it's hard." I raised my arms to cover my face and cried. We stayed that way for a while until my crying turned to faint sobs. He then pulled my arms down and leaned to kiss my eyelids.

"Try me." He said softly, his eyes pleading.

"I—" I closed my eyes and breathed out, trying to control my emotions. "I can never have a baby, Maxon." I whispered, looking away and then back at him.

His face was stone hard as he tried to digest what I just said. He looked at me, confused. "Tell me that's a joke, America."

I bit my lips. "It isn't. I wouldn't joke about something like this, would I?" I never could agree more to what he said. Ever since Doctor Matthew informed about it, I was hoping that he'd come running to me telling me that the results were wrong. That never happened though.

"If course it isn't." He said almost to himself. He looked as if he was contemplating about something. We remained silent for a while before he spoke again. "How? Didn't you say your family didn't have any problems about having children?"

"We don't. I _was_ also very much capable as we talked about it the last time." I said. I wanted to cry but I held it in. I just want this secret out of my system.

"Then what makes this time different?"

I swallowed the lump in my throat and looked straight at him. "It's because I was shot in the abdomen. It wasn't only my stomach that was damaged but also my reproductive organs." Tears started threatening to fall down so I looked up and wiped them away before I continued. "The doctor said that the chances of me getting pregnant are slim." I looked at him, my eyes red. "And even if I did get pregnant my body wouldn't be able to take the stress and strain of pregnancy. I would must probably die in the process, he said."

I looked at him to see how he would take it in but I just couldn't read his face. He removed himself on top of me and sat at the edge of the bed. His shoulders started shaking. "This is all my fault, America. If you hadn't met me this would have never happened."

I crawled towards him and hugged his back. "Maxon, stop it. It isn't your fault. I made a choice when I did that and I don't regret it. You're the best thing that ever happened to me."

"Don't lie, America. I know how much you have wanted to have children."

"But you are more important to me." I placed my right hand at his chin and moved it to my direction so that he was facing me. "more important than everything else." I closed my eyes and kissed him, my tears falling down once again. "Which is why we have to end this."

He looked at me, his eyes watery. "Why?" He whispered.

"I can't give you a child, Maxon. That's why."

"I don't care if you can or cannot give me a child. All I ever wanted was you, America! Can't you see that?" His voice cracked.

"Me too." I sighed. "But you are a prince, Maxon, who will soon be the king of Illea. You need a wife, a queen, who is perfectly capable of giving you an heir."

"All my life I've dedicated to this country. Did EVERTHING for this country. I never asked nor wanted anything in return. But now all I'm asking is YOU, America. Is that too much to ask?" He cried.

"I know." I pursed my lips. "But it's not just about us anymore."

"Can't I just be selfish for once?" He choked, tears rolling down his face.

"I wish it was that simple. I wish." I said to the both of us.

We stared at the ceiling fan watching it spin, letting time pass by us.

"I've never hated my position as much as I do now." He sighed.

"Don't say that. This country will have continued to suffer if not for you. You're a wonderful prince and will be a wonderful king." I offered.

"What do we do, America? What do I do without you?" tears streaming down his face.

"Marry Kriss." I said indifferently.

"But I don't love her. I love you!" He let out.

"I love you too, Maxon! But nothing will come out from this relationship! We still can't be together. Let's end this before we hurt each other." I cried.

"This isn't fair… not fair at all." His voice sounding a little bit higher than usual as he shook his head like a kid.

"It isn't." I agreed. I stood up, placed my head on top of his and hugged him. He then buried his head against my stomach and hugged me back.

"I love you." He sobbed. "so much that it hurts."

"I…" I closed my eyes. "I won't ever forget you."

He looked at me, his eyes filled with too many emotions, understanding that I was letting 'us' go. he placed his hands on my face and brought it down to his. Our lips both trembling as we kissed, knowing that our days together were counted.


	8. Chapter 8

**When in doubt trust the title! :)) Anyway, I have to do loads of work for different courses, so I won't be able to upload in a while. :( I'll try uploading as soon as I finish all the schoolwork.**

**Hope you enjoy this chapter! Well not really enjoy... but you get what I mean right? =)) Please Review! :D**

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-Maxon's POV-

I woke up to the sight of America, sleeping on my right shoulder. She looked really worn out. Her eyes were puffy while dried tear-marks decorated her face. I looked up to the ceiling fan and recalled everything that happened yesterday night. I thought I had her. I thought that if we knew about how deep our feelings ran, it would have been enough. Circumstances thinks differently though.

She told me that night to let 'us' go but how can I let go of something so beautiful? Something that made me live? Something worth fighting for?

'_Love can save the world.'_ I've heard, read and encountered this quote so many times. I thought it was such a cheesy and stupid line but when I met America, I've learned how true it was. She saved my world. I never thought I'd need such a complicated feeling in all my life; never thought I would be able to become a victim of such an emotion, but I did; and I loved it, craved for it, and needed it. She was what made the world beautiful and meaningful to me. Never in my whole life did I want to have the day pass sooner, so that I could be with her once again. It was such a wonderful thing: to love.

'How can something so perfect, so breath taking be so painful at the same time?' I pondered. Why was the world so cruel to me and my love? Just as fast as I've come to experience and have it. Just when I've fallen so hard. Just when it became something that I lived for. It was taken away from me.

Tears started to form on my eyes. I don't want to cry anymore, but I can't stop it. I'm so tired, so exhausted. I felt America shift closer to me, so I pulled her closer, enveloping her with my warmth. She won't ever be able to have a baby. And it pained me not just because it meant we can never get married and that she can never be my queen, but also for the reason she can never have a family. We've talked about it. I knew she wanted to have a lot of children but now she can't even have one. I felt guilt and despair course through my entire body. I wish I could turn back time and be the one who took the gun shots.

"Hey. What are you thinking about?" She said, as she rubbed her eyes. I looked at her and she gave me a weak smile. "Good morning."

"I wouldn't call it 'good' though." I responded sadly. She sat up and crawled out of the bed. I looked at my shoulder where she slept, missing already her warmth and the weight of her body next to me.

I was about to pull her down the bed when someone knocked and opened the door. It was Doctor Matthew, who for a moment looked stunned but regained his composure quickly.

"Did I disturb anything?" He asked looking at America. She just shrugged at him and went to the bathroom. He watched her go and then looked at me. "Rough night?"

I nodded. "Very."

We remained silent for a while till I mastered my will to talk. "She told me."

He looked at me confused but then realized what I meant. "I'm really sorry, Prince Maxon."

I gritted my teeth. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I wanted to give Miss Singer the chance to tell you, herself." He explained.

"And for what?! Don't you know how hard it was for her to tell me? Don't you know how much pain it caused her? YOU DON'T! Just because you think it's right doesn't mean it is!" I shouted.

"It'll never happen again." He said as he ducked his head low. I knew he meant well, but I couldn't stop myself from bursting out. I was losing the very thing that made me want to live. I'd like to think that I have the right to be unreasonably mean for the time being, but then I wasn't like that.

"I'm sorry." I sighed. "It's just that, everything is a mess to me, right now."

"I understand." He said and gave me an assuring smile.

America came out of the bathroom, looking more refreshed and with a set of new hospital gown. She went towards me and smiled, then looked at Doctor Matthew quite nervously. "Morning Doctor Matthew, what brings you here?" She asked, her voice a little bit shaky.

"Well, I have something good to tell you." He said while he looked at the clipboard he was holding.

She looked stiff for a moment and somehow I knew what she was hoping her. My heart was beating fast. I brushed my right hand against hers. She looked at me and squeezed it.

"You can be discharged by tomorrow." He simply stated.

"Just that?" Her eyes hoping for more.

"Just that." He replied, his eyes showing glints of sadness. She sighed and was about to let go of my hand but I held on to it. "Well, I better got going. I have things to do. I'm sorry for disturbing you."

"It's alright." I said and offered him a smile. He smiled back and went his way. When we were finally alone, I let myself fall down the bed.

"I guess this is the final good bye, huh?" She sat next to me.

I looked at her, brows frowning. "What do you mean?"

"I'll be discharged tomorrow, Maxon. I'll go back to Carolina. I've been gone for too long." She explained.

"What about me?" Why does it seem so easy for her to let things go while I feel like I my whole world is crumbling before my eyes.

She looked at me meaningfully and all negative thoughts were dispelled off me. I just can't help but adore her.

"What about ME, Maxon? There's no use in staying in the palace if we already know who you are going to pick in the end." Her voice trembled at each word. And from that, I knew she felt the same way I did.

"I'll always pick you, America. No matter the circumstances." I said softly.

"And you'll always be in my heart." She added.

"If only I wasn't a prince." I chocked. I was getting rather emotional again.

"But then I wouldn't have met you." She offered.

"You don't know that." I argued.

She laid right next to me, and shifted her body so that she was facing me. "I don't but I wouldn't come to know you like this." She smiled quite brightly. _Beautiful. _

"You know, you have to stop looking like an angel or else, it would be harder for me to let go." I joked but my voice sounding a little bit strained and forced. She didn't respond. She just looked straight at me, I couldn't see anything else but sadness in her eyes.

"How do I let you go, America?" I suddenly asked, not realizing that tears were already falling down my face. "Please, tell me." I cried out, my shoulders shaking.

"I can't answer that, Maxon. I can't also seem to let you go." She replied, almost like a whisper.

"Then we don't." I concluded.

She looked at me and shook her head. "I hope it was that easy."

"Maybe it can be." I said rather too optimistically.

She looked thoughtfully and then shrugged. "Maybe… but not in this lifetime, Maxon."

We were silent again. The room somehow feeling emptier than before.

"I—I love you. I just want to let you know that." I blurted out. I was afraid that if I didn't say these words I would never able to say it again.

Her eyes widened and then she chuckled. "I remember how hard it was to say those words in the past but now we can't help but say them."

"Yeah." I looked up the ceiling fan and recalled all those times that I was about to say those 3 words but didn't, because I was too afraid. Afraid that it would scare her. Afraid that she would reject me; that she only wanted nothing more than friends from me. If I had said it only sooner then things might have been different.

"Maxon." I heard her say, her voice trembling a little bit. I looked at her and waited for her to continue.

"Can I ask something from you?" She said nervously.

"Anything, America. **Anything**." And I meant it. I'd give the entire world if she told me so.

"I want—uhm... nevermind." She backed out and shrugged. Her face somehow looked flushed. She tried to leave the bed but I pulled her down.

"Tell me, America. Please?" I plead.

She covered her face with her hands and then looked at me again. She pursed her lips as if trying to master the will to tell me. Her actions made me more determined to know what it was.

"You're not going to let me go, if I didn't tell you, am I right?" She asked, her voice shaking.

I shook my head and looked straight at her again.

"I—I want you to be my first." She quickly said and then covered her very red face. It took me a few seconds to understand what she meant. I blushed furiously. "Forget about what I just said." She sighed and then tried standing up again but just like earlier, I pulled her down.

"America, look at me." And she did. I kissed her faintly and smiled. "Me also."

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_Note: I'll still keep this story rated T. So don't expect you-know-what scenes. :))) _


	9. Chapter 9

**Hey guys sorry for the wait! As compensation I wrote more than the usual. And just to inform you I'm still not done with schoolwork! :)) So yeah update is going to be slow. :'( They just keep on piling up!**

**Anyway, read some reviews and predictions. Just to give you an idea: I'd like to add that, yes ,I did say trust the title but that doesn't necessarily mean there won't be any tragedy.**

**Hope you guys enjoy this Chapter.**

**Slightly Rated M! :))**

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-Maxon's POV-

The palace was somehow brighter than the last time I've seen it. Ever since America woke up from coma, I've excused myself from my royal duties, saying that I needed to go to some province within the country to do some field research. It wasn't really like me to lie, but if I didn't, people would realize who I really was in love with. Who I really wanted to be with. Even though I wanted to shout it to the whole world, I can't, not until I was sure that America was in perfect condition to be chosen queen. My eyes suddenly darkened by that thought. She can't be chosen. Not anymore. Even if she's the one I've wanted all along. I didn't realize how much I've been lost in my thoughts when America suddenly stood in front of me and held both of my hands.

"Hey." She smiled.

'How can I let go of someone who smiles like this?' I thought.

"Tell me what's bothering you?" she added.

I let out a sigh of frustration. "You know what's been bothering me… and it's more than just that." I looked at her sadly.

"I'm sorry." She said, bobbing her head down.

How can she say sorry when it wasn't her fault? "Don't say that, America. It was never your fault." I was about to embrace her when someone came running down the staircase.

"Maxon! You're home!" Kriss squealed. America immediately retreated back. I tried holding onto one of her hands but she just snatch it as soon as I did. I looked at her but she just kept looking down.

I let out another sigh and looked at Kriss, panting quite heavily. Before I could greet her she hugged me tightly. I was shocked for a moment but I quickly recovered, hugging her back.

"I am, my dear." I said, feeling her body shake.

"I've missed you so much." She whispered, her voice trembling a bit.

"I'm sorry for being away for too long." I responded indifferently. She cried on my shoulders for some time before looking up to me. I wiped her tears away and smiled. "But I'm here now, aren't I?"

"You are." She chuckled. She looked down and then up again somehow more determined. She wasn't crying nor smiling anymore. She looked serious and captivated. 'With what?' I thought. She then started closing the gap between our lips and I immediately started panicking so I moved my head to the side, making her lips kiss my right jaw instead. She looked at me, confused and I suddenly felt bad.

'Maxon, she's the one you're supposed to marry at least show a little affection.' I thought to myself. I then realized that America was still at my back. I quickly turned around but she wasn't there anymore. No. This isn't how our day was supposed to be. I started walking briskly when Kriss held my hand.

"Where are you going? Are you ok?" Her eyes filled with worry.

"I—I just have something really important to do in the office and it can't wait. Sorry." I lied and removed my hand from her grip.

"Oh…. Uhmm.. Ok. Visit me when it's done." She replied sadly. I couldn't care anymore. I just nodded at her and went my way.

* * *

-still Maxon's POV-

I opened the door to America's room, seeing her being surrounded by her maids who were crying. She looked at me with surprised eyes. I cleared my throat before I spoke. "I'm sorry to disturb you ladies, but I have something important to say to America. I'll make sure you see her first in the morning."

They wiped their tears and looked a little bit abashed. "Thank you, your highness." They all responded and I smiled apologetically at them. I then moved a little bit, giving them way to the door. Before Mary left, she looked at America and give her a wink, which made America blush a deep red.

Once I couldn't hear their footsteps in the hallway anymore, I closed the door. I then looked back at America, who was now lying on her bed, facing to the left side so that she wasn't facing me. I walked towards her, sitting at the edge of the bed. I placed my hand on her shoulder and pulled her gently so that she was facing me. Her eyes looked red, like she was restraining herself from crying and it just broke me inside.

"It's not what it seems, America. You know that."

"It's none of my concern, Maxon. You can do whatever you want with Kriss." She mumbled, looking away from me. It felt like my heart suddenly stopped beating and my stomach plummeting down.

I suddenly felt anger rising. "How could you say that? When I'm still very much in love with you. You're ridiculous!" My eyes were stinging now, my hands and shoulders trembling from frustration and anger.

She suddenly sat up and pushed me so hard that made us both fall down the bed. She laid on top of me her hands on my chest. Her eyes were filled with tears and her face was very red from anger. "Y-YOU! You have no right to tell me that I'm RIDICULOUS!" She spat. "You have no right to be even angry with me!"

I couldn't retort back. I was just too stunned to do anything at all. She spoke again, her voice almost like a cry. "Do you know how hard it was to say those words?! Do you know how painful it was to see you embrace her and hear you say those sweet words to her! And I couldn't say anything because I was in no position to be even jealous."

"We can't be together. I know that! I told you to marry Kriss and I thought it was going to fine because all that ever mattered to me was you!" She started trembling uncontrollably, her breathing heavy but she still continued. "When I saw the two of you, I saw a glimpse of the future, Maxon. You're going to marry her and have children. The people will love her and you will also. WHILE I—" She choked. She didn't finish the sentence and instead she brought her head down to my chest and cried. I placed my left hand on her waist, hugging her while my right hand was stroking her hair. Tears started coming down my face and soon after I was also crying.

When we were both calm enough, I raised her head and cupped my hands around her cheeks. "I'm sorry I got angry and said those words." My eyes filled with sadness. "I love you, America. I don't want to spend our last few days fighting." I confessed. She nodded and I brought her face down so that our lips would meet. The kiss was very brief. She raised her head up and we stared into each other.

She let out a chuckle. "Well I was really ridiculous as you said."

I removed the strands of hair that covered her face and smiled at her. "Not really." We were silent for a while when a thought suddenly came into my mind making me smirk. "Now, about what we talked about last night."

She looked at me with confusion which made me grin wider. I leaned towards her right ear and couldn't contain my smile. "I'm making you mine tonight."

Her eyes widened and she blushed furiously. "But last night I thought you didn't…"

I smirked again. "Why? Did you want to do it in a hospital?" I teased, making her blush even more. She was about to hit me on the chest, so I grabbed her hands and flipped our position. I was now on the top. I trapped her with my body, my hands holding her hands down.

"Let me go, Maxon Schreave!" She said with an irritated voice. 'She looks even cuter when she's annoyed' I thought.

"Nope." I said like a little rebellious boy.

"Immature little kid." She mumbled to herself.

I smiled even wider "What did you say?"

"Nothing."

"Really?"

"Really."

I stood up, carrying her in my arms. She tried squirming and kicking but it didn't bother me at all. "Put me down, Maxon!" She shouted, so I tossed her on the bed. She sat up and was about to scold me when I crawled in and kissed her hard. She tried fighting at first but eventually she caved in and responded with equal amount of force. I smiled through the kiss and held her face closer with my left hand while I removed my tie with my right. I kicked my shoes, not minding where it fell off.

We broke the kiss as we tried to catch our breath. I looked at her, my eyes filled with hunger. I kissed her again and with greater passion. I brushed my tongue against her lips, asking for permission. When she opened her mouth I quickly slid my tongue in, tasting her but not getting enough of her. I placed my hands at her back, unzipping her dress. 'Thank god, they weren't held by buttons like last time' I thought. She fumbled through the buttons of my shirt and so I helped her. I threw the shirt down and removed my belt and pants so that I was only in my boxers. I looked at her dress and pulled it down. She tried covering herself but I stopped her. "You're beautiful. Don't you know that?" I said honestly. I've always wanted to say it. That she's beautiful. It boggled me why she was so insecure of herself, when in my eyes she was the epitome of perfection.

I kissed her on the neck and up to her jaws until our lips met again. I placed a hand on her thigh, going higher as each second passed. I broke the kiss and looked at her "Are you sure you want it to be me?" She looked at me like I was asking something obvious. "Only you." She whispered. My eyes darkened with lust and I kissed her again.

* * *

-America's POV-

It was already morning, and the sun was already high but I didn't want to wake up yet so I buried myself on a rather large pillow that was weirdly warm and not that soft. I opened my eyes slightly to see what it was. When the haziness finally disappeared, I saw Maxon sleeping right beside me—naked. I sat up and realize that I was also naked. It took me a few seconds before it all came in. 'America, you truly are stupid! You did it with Maxon last night.'

I looked at his sleeping face. He truly was handsome. I went closer to him and brushed the tip of my hand on his lips and then started tracing his face. First his forehead and then to his nose bridge. When I was about to touch his lips again, he caught my hand and opened his eyes. He grinned cheekily and I couldn't help but blush from embarrassment.

"It's not what it looks—" Before I could finish my explanation, he kissed me and I couldn't help but moan. 'Damn, he's getting good at this' I thought.

He entwined his right hand on my hair and looked at me, somewhat pleading. "Can we do it again?" How can he ask as if it's not THAT he was asking for. It almost sounded like he was a kid asking me to push the swing again.

"I take back what I said yesterday… you're the one who's ridiculous! I'm still aching you know?!" I reasoned out.

He looked at me with puppy eyes. Oh god, not that! "I'll be gentle, I promise. Pretty please?"

I couldn't let this guy speak anymore. Does he even know how embarrassing he sounds like?! But then this is one of the things that makes him adorable. I rolled my eyes at him and nodded. "Promise?" I teased, smiling a little bit.

"Promise." He grinned and suddenly pushed me down the bed making me squeal.

"Hey!" I protested but he just ignored me and started kissing me playfully.

"love you."

I rolled my eyes again and cupped his face so that he was looking at me "And I love YOU too." I said, making him grin even wider. "And you. Are. HOPELESS." I added. He rolled his eyes, not really meaning it.

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That day, may body ached so much. I glared at him as he diverted his guilty eyes. "You promised!"

"I—I just couldn't help it." He stuttered. "Sorry."

I let out a sigh and shrugged, finally giving in. "I forgive you."


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you guys for all the reviews! Hoping to hear more from you, readers :) Update's going to be slow on weekdays**

**Also praying that you won't kill me 'cause of this chapter! :)) Oh well, hope you like it!**

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-Maxon's POV-

I couldn't help but smile as I walked along the hallway. Every time I came across some palace guard or maid, I'd greet them and in return they'd look at me weirdly but greet me back, nonetheless. It's been 4 days since we came back here, and every day I'd sneak into America's room. Sometimes when she sees me sneaking into her room, she'd look at me with horror and then covers herself up with a blanket. She'd glare at me and would tell me to go away, but I know she never meant that.. or maybe she did?

Well, I'm very much sure now, I'm such a wolf. I know I should be restraining myself, and I've been trying, really trying but ever since that night, I just can't get enough of her. When I see her and how wonderful she was. When she smiles and laughs at me. When she looks at me with those green eyes. I can't help but want her.

I was heading towards her room when Kriss suddenly showed up. She looked at me meaningfully which made me feel guilty. I took a deep breath. 'Maxon, put on the mask, just like how you usually did in the past.' I ordered myself.

"Good morning, my dear." I simply said, not really meaning it. I wanted to end this conversation even before it started. I want to be where I wanted to be, which was by America's side.

"Hey." She said weakly, making me worry a bit.

I went closer to her and placed my right hand on her forehead checking her temperature. "Are you ok?"

She nodded at me and bit her lower lip. "You haven't visited me ever since you came back…"

Oh. OH. I forgot about it. "Sorry, I've been really busy these past few days." Well, that wasn't really a lie.

"Yes, I understand." She looked down. "And I overheard America's finally awake and she's here. Is it true?"

I was somehow dumbfounded. Didn't she see her when she came rushing to me the day America and I arrived in the palace?

"Yes she is." I smiled. I watched her sigh a breath of relief.

"Thank goodness. I'm happy she's alright." She really is a good girl. She'd certainly would make a wonderful queen for someone but not mine. Suddenly, I was already missing America.

"I'm sorry to say this but I really have to go."

She nodded sadly at me. I let out a sigh and went to hug her. "Why don't we have dinner tomorrow? Is that ok?" I asked.

Her eyes were glistering once again. She smiled and hugged me tightly. "That would be great, Maxon."

I started walking again, my mind elsewhere when someone suddenly called my name, making me shrug in frustration. 'Not again' I thought. I looked back to see Gavril running towards me.

"Prince Maxon! Good thing I caught up to you." He said as he panted heavily.

"What's the problem, Gavril?" I asked.

He breathed in and out a few times before started talking again. "It's not really a problem, your highness but it's just that it's been almost a month now since the day the rebels came in and disrupted the ceremony. People are clamouring about why you haven't chosen anyone yet. It's not a good idea to keep them waiting. That would make a bad impression and we obviously don't want that."

My eyes darkened and my body stiffened. "What do you propose?"

"You have to make the announcement within this week. I know I'm in no place to give you an ultimatum but we can't sit idle, especially when our country is under the threat of the rebels. We can't afford to make our people doubt. We can't."

I gritted my teeth. Why does it have to be now of all time? I know this day would come but I never expected it to come this sooner. I combed my hand through my hair and let out a grunt. "How many days more till this week ends?"

"Three more days." He replied. No! That's too short. I wanted to let out a cry of frustration but I held it in.

"I'll announce it on the last day." I said stiffly.

"Thank you for understanding, Prince Maxon." His voice sounding truly relieved.

I nodded at him and continued walking. What do I do now?

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-America's POV-

I heard someone knocking at the door. Knowing who it was, I ran quickly and opened it, my face radiating happiness.

"Hey." His voice sounded lifeless. He looked like his soul was sucked out from him. His body was stiff and his eyes were staring into nothingness. It's as if he wasn't in this world.

"What's the problem?" I asked, my voice laced with worry.

He looked at me, his eyes filled with too many emotions, overlapping at each other. And somehow, without him talking, I knew what it was. I hugged him, feeling his body tremble against mine.

'So this is it.' I thought, tears started to cloud my vision.

"I'm not ready, America. I won't ever be ready! I just can't let you go." He cried out.

I can't lose my composure right now. I can't, not when Maxon's like this. I tilted his head and kissed him gently, tears rolling down my face. It was a kiss that meant a thousand words of what he meant to me. "You have to. We have to."

"But I don't want to." His voice sounding like a little child.

"Me also." I said as I stroked his hair. When he finally calmed down, I closed the door and let him sit on my bed. I poured him a glass of water and gave it to him. "Here, drink this. You're probably thirsty from all that crying." I teased.

He looked straight into my eyes, his face serious. "Why don't we just run away?"

I was shocked for a second and let out a gasp. "Maxon, do you understand what you're saying? We can't do that! That's too selfish of us. Think of what will happen to the country!"

"I know." He let out a sigh of frustration. "I—I just want us to be together. I love you, America. You feel the same way, don't you?" His voice, unsure.

My eyes softened and I sat next to him. "I do, Maxon. So—so much." I took his right hand with both of mine and raised to kiss it. He looked tenderly at me and placed his left hand on my cheek. I closed my eyes as our lips met, relishing these last few moments I had with him.

He didn't leave the room till tomorrow came. The remaining days passed by us like a blur. On the day of the final selection, he came to my room. We didn't do anything but just look at each other, as if imprinting everything about us and everything we've done.

When the time came for us to leave the room, he cupped his hands on my face and gave me one last kiss. "I want to choose you, America."

I shook my head as tears streamed down my face. "But you can't, Maxon."

He hugged me tightly "I'll always love you."

"No, you shouldn't." I shook my head. "Not anymore. Promise me you'll move on, Maxon." And it pained me to say those words.

"Don't ask me something I can't do, America!" His eyes were pleading to take back the words that I've said, but I didn't.

I took a step back and gave him the bracelet he gave to me from New Asia. He was lost of words. He gripped onto the bracelet and buried it in his back pocket.

"I'm sorry." I said as I left the room, trying to hold back my tears.

The very same day, I went back home to Carolina.

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-still America's POV (a week after the selection ended)-

I was making lunch when someone came knocking at the door. I wiped my hands on my apron and turned the stove off. I went and opened the door to see a very frustrated Georgia in front of me.

"I heard." She let out.

I looked at her, confused. "Heard what?"

"That Maxon didn't choose you! How? WHY?!" she exasperated.

I just shrugged. "It just is and Kriss isn't such a bad person. She's one of you, do you know that?"

She rolled her eyes at me. "I do. But I don't care about that, not anymore. Tell me, America. What happened? I was so sure." Her eyes filled with bewilderment and I caved in. I've been keeping these emotions in check for so long that I never realized it had bottled up. I broke down and started crying hard. She soothed my back and waited for me to calm down. "You can tell me, America." She said, her eyes filled with sincerity. And so I told her everything and she listened through it all. Not interrupting me even once. When I was finished, I could see tears streaming down her face.

"Oh, America! I wish I could do something."

I smiled at her. "You've already helped me. Thanks for listening to me."

"No. Don't say that! I'm the one who's supposed to be thankful. It must be hard to relive those memories, more especially tell them! I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have asked."

I let out a sigh. "No. Seriously, talking to you made me feel a whole lot better."

She nodded and we were silent for some time before she spoke again. "I know this is too much to ask, and I feel really horrible saying this especially after I've heard about what happened between you and Prince Maxon, but we really need you."

"What is it?" I asked.

She looked straight at me and cleared her throat before talking again. "We need you to be our representative. You'd probably be staying at the palace in the meantime, while we work out the paperwork."

My eyes widened in shock. "For what?! And I don't think I could just stay in the palace with that kind of reason, unless you're expecting me to break in just like how you guys usually do it?"

"No! No! Not anything like that! Knowing that Prince Maxon will soon be crowned king, we are trying to be civil now… Anyway, we already talked about it with Prince Maxon. We need someone to represent, us, the lower cases."

"And he agreed it to be me?!"

"Not exactly. He doesn't know. We haven't talked about it." She explained. "We're not forcing you, America but we really do need you."

I still couldn't believe this. "Why me out of all people?"

She looked at me as if it was something obvious. "The people want you, America. When you told them to fight, they listened to you. They trust you more than anyone else, which is why we need you to represent them."

I absorbed it all in. "And the palace thing... it's not really going to be permanent. When everything's settled, you'll be moving around the country most of the time." She added.

"I—I don't know, Georgia. I don't think I can do it." I know I can't.

"Please, America. It's for the sake of this country." Her eyes pleading.

I paused for a while, thinking about how I should respond. _I'm already broken inside, why not break it even more?_ I gave one big sigh before answering. "I'll do it."

She smiled thankful at me, her spirit's up again. "Then pack your things up, we're leaving today!"

"Wait! What?!"


	11. Chapter 11

**Sorry guys, it's been a while since I last updated. Had a lot of things to do. I'll probably update again once the weekend starts. Have to prepare for an exam :|.**

**Hope you guys like this chapter! :) Please do review if you can! I would really appreciate it :D**

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-Maxon's POV-

The sun was shining brightly, the sky was very blue, the grass were green, and the trees were lush. Anyone would have said that it was such a beautiful day. Anyone but me. I hated this day and how normal and peaceful it looked. I hated how everyone was going about like nothing happened. How can the world go on like this? It's too painful. Ever since I ended the selection I've felt nothing but emptiness and loneliness. The first few days, felt like I was dying inside and now I felt like an empty shell. I ate, I slept, I passed documents, gave out orders. I've become a person who was living but not alive. My world just stopped and shattered like thin glass, but I wasn't even bothered at all to pick up the pieces.

Kriss was very worried of me, asking me if I was ok which obviously I wasn't, but I couldn't say that. I just put on a mask not only to her but to everyone else. I'd say I was ok, that I was only tired. I'd give them, those forced smiles, empty praises and words of encouragements. I really wanted to mean the things I've said and done to them, but how could I? When deep inside I couldn't feel at all. When deep inside my heart felt lifeless even as it was beating.

Someone came knocking through the door. "Come in." I couldn't even bother standing up from my sit. It was Kriss, who in return looked at me with hesitation. "What brings you here, Princess Kriss?" I smiled quite forcefully, the word princess leaving distaste in my mouth. I still have to get used to that.

"Well, we haven't been really doing anything ever since the selection ended so I was thinking about going on a date?" She looked at me hopefully and I knew I couldn't just brush her away, I was about to be forced to answer her when, a guard luckily came rushing through the door. I sighed out of relief. 'You just saved my day' I thought and looked at him gratefully which he misinterpreted as being angry.

"I'm so-sorry for intruding, Your Highness." He stuttered.

"It's ok, we were just talking about trivial matters." I answered back. Kriss looked somewhat displeased but just shrugged.

"I'll just talk to you when you're not busy anymore." She smiled at me and then went her way. When she was finally out of earshot, I looked back at the guard signalling him to come closer.

"What's the matter?" I asked.

"There is someone who is looking for you, sir" He said in a monotonous tone.

Someone? "Who?"

"A northern rebel, sir. A girl precisely."

My eyes widened. It maybe Georgia. I talked to her and August about taking down the caste system and they proposed that it would be better if there would be a representative for the lower castes that can help disseminate and explain the project to them; someone who these castes trust and would believe. 'Who might it be?' I thought, my interest not having been perked up since _she_ left that day.

_America._ 'No, Maxon. Don't think about her, think about your duty. You don't have time to be moping around.' I shrugged and then looked at the guard. "Tell her I'll be on my way."

The guard simply nodded and went his way. I looked out of the window and into the horizon of endless trees. _America. _I took out the bracelet that has been in my pocket ever since that day, and stared at it, recalling everything about her and what she had meant to me. I closed my eyes and gave the bracelet a squeeze before dropping it back again. 'Focus, on the job' I said to myself before finally standing up.

* * *

-America's POV-

I was finally back. The palace was just the same, grand and big but somehow it looked lonelier. 'This is it.' I thought to myself, letting out a sigh. I really am a masochist for accepting this job.

"Hey, you've been out of this world for some time, now. Are you ok?" Georgia held my right hand slightly, and gave me a concerned look.

I squeezed her hand and smiled at her. "Yeah, it's just that it was just a week ago and now I'm back again."

"Yeah… I'm truly sorry for putting you in such a position." She agreed sadly.

I looked at her and shook my head. "It's my decision anyway." I assured her.

We were silent for a while before she spoke again. "Anyway, can you wait here? I'll go inside the palace and ask for Prince Maxon. I don't think it's a good idea that we both go inside since we're already unwelcomed, alone."

I nodded and went towards the shade of a tree. Hiding slightly even though we were already in a secluded area of the palace. 'Don't want guards pointing out guns at me.' I thought. Georgia gave me one last wave of goodbye before finally leaving the area.

I sat on one of the roots of the tree and looked up to the sky. It's such a beautiful day but I can't bring myself to appreciate it, especially now that I'm back here. I closed my eyes and let myself rest, realizing that I haven't slept yet since we left Carolina. Soon after I could feel myself succumbing to sleep.

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.

The blue sky was now painted in black, the clouds replaced with stars, and the sun with the moon. 'How long was I asleep?' I thought. I stood up and looked around searching for signs of life. Georgia hasn't come back yet since she left me. I couldn't stop worrying about her. She should have fetched me hours ago. I started walking towards the direction of the palace. I didn't care anymore if the guards see and arrest me. All I wanted to know is if Georgia was ok. As I was already near the palace garden, I heard footsteps. I quickly hid at one of the bushes, my heart racing widely. The footsteps became louder and I started hearing murmurs.

Someone was laughing. A girl? "Hey, stop it!" I heard her say.

"I will not!" a voice replied. A guy? OK. So I'm now sure there were two people. A guy and a girl, who obviously were flirting around. I rolled my eyes, feeling ridiculous.

"HAHAHA, seriously, stop!" The girls shrieked, her voice somewhat familiar to me.

"What's the magic word?" The guy said smugly. Why does this sound so familiar to me? I tried peeking from the bushes but it was too dark to see who they were.

"Please?" The girl guessed.

"Go on." The guy said, still not pleased with her answer. Seeing that the girl was still laughing, he was still probably tickling her.

"Not fair!" She answered back.

"I won't stop till you say it completely."

"Ok! Ok! Just let me speak, ok?"

The girl stopped laughing and started to pant which meant that he stopped tickling her. 'Why do they sound so familiar to me?' I thought again.

"Please, I beg of you, stop. For the sake of my wellbeing." She finally said.

"Very well." He replied, proudly.

It was silent for a while before I heard one of them talk again. "Hey." The girl said.

"Hey."

"I love you."

"And I love you too."

"Maxon—" I heard her say and then my heart suddenly stopped. **Maxon.** Tears started to well up in my eyes.

'So that's why they sounded so familiar!' It was Maxon and Kriss all along. I suddenly felt betrayed. How can he do that? How can he do and say those things to her, things which he had done and said to me?! I felt really dejected and furious. Was I played around all this time? I never knew he was such a sly fox! I stood up from where I hid and stormed towards them. They looked at me with shocked eyes, but I didn't care. I slapped Maxon right on his face.

"A-America.. How?" His hand touching the place where my hand met his face.

"You don't have any right to ask anything from me!" I shouted. "So, all along you were playing with me? Am I right?"

He was still confused about everything. I let out a sigh of frustration. I don't want to hear anything from him, anymore. I just can't trust anything he'd say or do even if they're true. I turned around and started walking when a hand stopped me. I glared at him.

"I'm sorry." Sorry?! Sorry!? Is that all he had to say after playing with me; telling me that it was only me? I hissed at him and snatched my hand back, starting to move again. Suddenly, the ground beneath me started to crumble. 'What the?' Soon after, I was falling.

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My eyes fluttered open. My head felt heavy. It was still morning. Judging by the shadows, it hasn't been long since Georgia left. 'What a horrible dream.' I thought.

I started stretching my body when I heard footsteps. This feels like a déjà vu. I gave out a grunt and moved towards the back of the tree so that I was out of sight from the direction of the people who were coming.

"Why can't you just tell me who the representative is, Georgia?" Maxon. It was Maxon. My heart started beating fast.

"Well, I want it to be a surprise." She replied to him, giving him a smile. He just shrugged at her and continued walking. When they were finally only a few meters away, Georgia looked around.

"So where is he or she?" Maxon asked impatiently. "Don't tell me we're lost."

"We're not. Why are you in such a bad mood anyway?" She rolled her eyes at him, looking a bit annoyed.

He paused for a while before replying, his voice softer. "I'm really sorry. A lot of things happened and I'm always on the edge."

Georgia seemed not to take it well. "It's not only you, you know." She started moving around, looking for me. "It's safe. It's just us, so you can come out now." She called out to me.

I breathed in and out, mastering all my will to move. I don't want to see him but at the same time I desperately want to. I'm such an indecisive person. I finally got the will and came out of my hiding place and called to them. "I'm here." I said firmly. Georgia and Maxon whipped their bodies towards my direction. Maxon's eyes grew.

"America." He gasped. He froze for a second but then started running towards me.

* * *

-Maxon's POV-

"America." I gasped. ' Am I just imagining things? Have I come to this point of insanity?' No. I'm not. I'm sure I'm not. Without realizing it my feet started running towards her, abandoning all sense of logic. I came crashing at her, which made us both fall down the ground. I pulled her towards me and embraced her, my whole body shaking.

America. America. America. All I could think about right now is her. I've missed her so much. I could feel her hands wrap around me, patting me slightly at the back. I moved myself backwards so that I could see her face. She was just like how I've last seen her._ Beautiful_. She smiled sadly at me and raised her hands to brush my disheveled hair back to its place. "Hey, you look horrible." She joked.

I chuckled while tears streamed down my face. "Yeah." I looked at her. Now that I studied her, she was a bit thinner and paler than before. "You're here?" somewhat my brain still cannot process that all of this, is true.

"I am." I could see her eyes getting watery.

"I've missed you so much" I said honestly, embracing her once again. She didn't reply and just nodded as she buried herself onto me. Georgia smiled at us and signaled me that she was going to leave for a while. I returned the smile and mouthed a thank you before she finally left. I then looked at the goddess. It was still so surreal to me. I placed my hands on her shoulder and moved it so that we were both facing at each other. "How? Why are you here?"

'Please don't tell me you're just here to visit me.' I prayed.

She cleared her throat and wiped her tears away. "Georgia, asked me to be the representative."

"You're the representative?!" My eyes widened in shock. My heart beating erratically. 'So this means she'll be staying for a while in the palace.' I couldn't help but smile stupidly.

"Yeah… She told me people listened to me when I told them to fight. She said that I was the perfect candidate." Her voice filled with doubt as she shrugged. "I don't believe so but if that's what she thinks, maybe there's some truth in it."

And somehow, I knew Georgia was right. America was the perfect candidate—no not just perfect but the only one who can represent the lower castes. "Are you kidding me? The people DID listen to you and WILL listen to you, America. Georgia, picked the most suitable person to be the representative." I assured her.

"I hope you're right." She shrugged.

"I know I am." I smiled cheekily. She rolled her eyes at me. I was about to close the gap between us but she suddenly stood up and brushed away the dirt on her pants.

"Georgia, where are you?" She called. I hesitantly stood up also, confused about why she rejected my advancement.

Georgia appeared, eating some apple that she probably plucked from the orchard. "You guys done already?" She asked through bites.

"We are." America replied as she went towards Georgia. "I'm tired, we should go."

"Well, that was quick." Georgia raised her brows and looked at me. I just shrugged my shoulders and started walking.

"I'll show the way." I said, as I led them towards the palace entrance.

"You ok?" I heard Georgia whisper at America. She didn't reply but I knew without looking that she nodded at Georgia.


	12. Chapter 12

**Thank you so much for all the reviews, favorites and follows! You guys motivate me to continue on writing this. As you've noticed update has been really slow, and I'm really sorry about that. I don't think I can update as often anymore. Maybe twice a week at most. School has been tough on me. A lot of requirements and books to read plus all those extra-curricular stuff from orgs . :\ **

**Anyways, setting those things aside I hope you enjoy this chapter!**

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-America's POV-

Anne, Mary and Lucy were very ecstatic when I arrived at my room. They came rushing to me and embraced me all at once which made me lose my balance. Good thing they caught me before I fell down.

"Lady America, we thought we wouldn't be able to serve you anymore!" Lucy said while helping me steady myself.

"We've missed you so much, Miss!" Mary added as Anne nodded in agreement. I couldn't help but smile, tears threatening to fall down my face. I never realized how much I've missed and needed these girls. It felt like forever, when in fact it had just been a week and some days ago since I left this place.

"Tell us how you've been, Lady America!" said Anne. "How was Carolina?"

"Did you meet anyone new?" Lucy added.

"How's family?" Mary added another.

I chuckled. "One question at a time you know! Can't answer those all at once!" We all laughed before I spoke again. "Well it was ok, I guess. And I didn't meet anyone new." I looked at Lucy. "Seriously, it's just been a week, who do you think I am?" We laughed again. "Well, my family's fine. May is still very much hyper. Mom is still bugging me. Gerad grew so much, by the way! He's almost at my eye level now." We talked for an hour or so before I decided to end the evening.

I got up from where I sat and went towards my luggage. The girls immediately came following and helped me unpack some of the things I brought from Carolina. We finished rather early because I didn't really bring much with me. I looked out of the window feeling the chilly breeze of the night. I decided to take a bath since I haven't done so in the morning. Anne prepared it for me, lighting some candles and adding some rose scent in the water to help me relax and unwind myself. Once it was ready I soaked my entire body in the water and rest my head on the tub.

I looked out the window near the tub and stared at the starry night. It's been a very long day. As soon as we arrived at the palace, Georgia had to leave. I felt really bad for her because of the amount of stress and work pushed onto her, but I still wished she hadn't left that early, though. I wasn't ready to be alone with Maxon but luckily before he could talk to me, Kriss appeared in the hallway looking rather shocked. She looked at me with wide eyes and then to Maxon with question. It was the perfect opportunity for me to escape, so I took it. Maxon called out for me as I left the scene but I pretended not to hear him. When I was already a few meters away, I peeked to my back a little and saw a very frustrated Kriss while Maxon was explaining something. That something was probably me.

I stood up from the tub and dressed myself in my nightgown. As much as I've missed my maids I still didn't want them watching over me like a little kid, so I dismissed them. I watched them leave before doing anything else. When I couldn't hear their footsteps anymore, I went to my bed and tucked myself in. It didn't take me long before I dozed off to sleep but it was immediately disrupted when someone came knocking on the door. I grunted in frustration, rubbing my eyes as I stood up. My hair stuck all over the place and I didn't even bother to put on some robe. I opened the door, my eyes half open until I realized who it was. _Maxon._ All the sleepiness faded in a flash. My mouth was gaping now.

"Why are you here?" I asked out of shock. He looked at me with equal amount of shock and cleared his throat. His face redder than the usual.

"Uhm.. I'll just wait till you get dressed properly." He said and looked away from me. 'Oh my gosh, I'm basically in my underwear' I screamed to myself. 'but didn't he see my naked a lot of times, already? so why the blush?' I quickly went to my wardrobe and snatched the first robe I saw. I put it on and tied my hair into a bun. When I was finally done, I faced Maxon who was still currently facing away from my room.

"Done." I said. He looked at me from head to toe. I moved to the side, inviting him inside the room. I ended up sitting on the bed while he sat at a chair. It was an awkward silence for a while before I decided I've had enough of it "So tell me, why are you here?"

He combed his hair with his hands and bit his lower lip. His eyes filled with hurt. "Don't you miss me at all? Have you moved on that quickly, America?"

My heart felt like it turned to stone. I pursed my lips and breathed out, trying to contain whatever emotion I had right now. "And for what, Maxon? What do you want me to do?" I started out slow. "Say 'I still love you' ?" my voice was trembling, now. "Don't you think that's a little bit unfair for me? Tell me, Maxon, What do you want to happen? Because I seriously don't know anymore!" I finally cried out, my eyes brimming with tears. No matter how much I try to get a hold of my feelings, he always finds a way to break it down.

He looked tenderly at me. "America, don't you see? You are not the only one, for Pete's sake! Ever since you left, I was so miserable. The only thing I ever wanted in my whole life and mattered to me more than anything else, gone; taken away from me. I couldn't eat or sleep properly. Nothing was right anymore. Nothing." Tears rolled down his face. "I'm still very much IN love with YOU."

"Stop it." I mastered out. If I don't do this now, I won't ever be able to. "Get out of my room, Maxon." I said more firmly. He looked at me with bewilderment, his face stricken. I closed my eyes and laid on my bed, facing away from him. When I heard the door close I let myself collapse. Tears kept on pouring down. I covered my face with my hands. My body was shaking as I wept. "Don't go. Please Don't go." I whispered, my voice trembling. I felt something caress the back of my head, I turned around and my eyes widened.

Maxon was looking straight at me, tears also streaming down his face. "I didn't go, you know. I won't, even if you told me so."

I sat up, still confused. "But the door?"

He shook his head and looked at me. "When you turned away, I realized that the door was still open so I closed it."

I could feel my face get hot from embarrassment. I've never felt more stupid in my whole life, as I do now. I should have made sure that he really left before bursting out like that. Now, I have more reason not to want to see him. "Kill me now." I murmured while stuffing my face on a pillow.

I could hear him chuckle, so I glared at him, but that didn't work out well for me. My face was very red, my eyes were swollen and my nose was runny. I looked like a 4 year old kid in tantrum. When his chuckle turned to laughter, I decided I've had enough. I rolled my eyes at him and went back to bed. I felt him lay beside me, so I turned around to face him. "As much as I want you here, you really have to go, Maxon."

He shook his head and looked straight at me. "Not today. Not ever." He moved closer and embraced me. I couldn't help but just give in. I snuggled myself into his arms and closed my eyes. Soon after we were both drifting away to sleep.

* * *

-still America's POV-

Maxon was still asleep when I woke up so decided to head towards the bathroom to take a shower. It's been 5 days already since I came into the palace, and every night, Maxon would come into my room to sleep with me. Literally, sleep with me. Every time he made any advancement on me I'd immediately dodge it, even if I wanted to do just the same. I looked at the bathroom mirror. My hair was dripping wet. I tried looking for another towel because the one I just used was already very wet. I didn't find any inside the bathroom so I just dressed myself up and headed out of the room and into the hallway. I headed towards to direction of the maids' quarters.

Everything seemed livelier to me now. The day was so beautiful. I could hear the busyness of each room that I passed by in the palace. I could smell the sweet aroma of pastries and biscuits being cooked in the kitchen. I suddenly stopped on my tracks, feeling my stomach grumble. I was about to head inside the kitchen when I bumped into Kriss.

"Oh.. Good morning, Kriss." I greeted and somehow I couldn't look at her anymore but I forced myself to anyway.

She paused for a while, as if contemplating something before replying to me. "Thank you, America." She smiled quite forcefully. "I think that applies only to you, though."

I looked at her, baffled. "How come?"

Her smile vanished and I could see her grit her teeth. "Do you really think I didn't know?" I suddenly froze. "I've always played fair and square, America. Why can't you?" I couldn't speak, I suddenly felt really sick. "Maxon, chose ME and not you. Why can't you accept that?! Have you stooped down that low, that you'd try to steal someone who is already engaged to someone else?! What have I ever done to you, America, to deserve this?" Her eyes filled with hurt, frustration, betrayal and anger, all at the same time.

"It's not like that, Kriss. I—" I tried to explain when she suddenly slapped me on the face. I was shocked and looked at her. She was shaking, her eyes brimming with tears.

"Don't you ever say it's not like that. I am not stupid, America." She shook her head, her eyes never leaving mine. "I don't trust you. Not anymore. I thought you were better than this, but I was wrong." I pursed my lips, taking a huge breath so that I wouldn't burst out. "Stay away from, Maxon, ok? He already chose me." Her eyes started to soften when she continued "If it were the opposite, America, I would have respected his choice. So please, if not for me, for him. Do you want to turn him into an unfaithful person? You don't right? If you truly love him as you say you do, let him go."

I didn't say anything at all, instead I just nodded. I heard her let out a sigh before speaking again. "I'm sorry for slapping you, America."

"I deserved it anyway." I mumbled, not looking at her.

She sighed again. "Well, I need to go. I'm truly sorry, America, but I'm still sticking to what I've said. Stay away from him. It's for his sake, anyway."

When she was already out of sight, I let myself collapse on the floor, my back against the wall. Why can't things be simple? Why can't we love, when we love each other? This is just too much for me. I closed my eyes, letting the tears roll down my cheeks. When I finally calmed down, I stood up. I didn't feel any hunger anymore and I didn't care about if my hair was wet or not, and so I decided to just head back to my room. When I got back, Maxon was not there anymore. I let out a sigh of relief. I went towards the bed and noticed a yellow note on top of it.

.

.

_To the person who stole my heart,_

_You told me 4 nights ago not to go, and I didn't but why do I wake up in bed without you beside me? Do you know how scared I was? I was thinking it was all just a dream! _

_You know, I also don't want you to go. So just don't leave, ok? __ Wake me up next time. _

_I'm writing something embarrassing again, aren't I? _

_from the luckiest man in world,_

_Maxon Schreave_

_._

_._

My hands were trembling as I held onto the note. "What do I do?" I whispered to myself. I suddenly felt sick again. I laid down on the bed and looked up to the ceiling.


	13. Chapter 13

**Uhmm... I wouldn't say enjoy this chapter. Well, hope you can bear this chapter! Sorry if it's not.. I don't know hahahah I just don't know what to feel about this chapter.**

**Anyway, happy reading! lol**

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-Maxon's POV-

One of my subjects was presenting about budget allocations for the year. I knew how important this was, ever since my father died I've been running the country blindingly; trying to take a grasp of everything at once but failing to do so. My father never truly taught me how to run the country, he just kept on imposing things on me; I never really had a choice but now, everything has been shoved to me. Everything pointed to me and my decisions. And it frightens me. What if I made the wrong choices? What if I become a much worse ruler than my father? These things have been haunting me, ever since I took all of the responsibilities, but what worries me as of this meeting, relates nothing to those. I haven't seen America since I left her room this morning. She didn't come to eat breakfast and lunch. I heard from one of her maids that she would also do the same for dinner. I tapped the pen I was holding and then started biting on its end. The presenter seem to notice that I wasn't paying attention anymore.

"Is everything all right, Your Highness?" He asked, pushing his spectacles up his nose bridge.

For a moment I was disoriented. I felt really ashamed. How could I put my personal worries first, before the country? "I'm just having a bad day." I explained. He nodded and started discussing again.

The meeting finished rather early and miraculously I was able to listen through it all. I immediately gathered my things and ran towards my office to leave them there. Afterwards, I walked briskly towards the direction of America's room. I knocked on her door but no one answered. 'Where are her maids?' I pondered. Seeing that no one was responding to my knocks, I decided to just barge my way in.

America was lying in her bed, she looked at me in bewilderment.

"Why didn't you open the door? And where are your maids?" I asked worriedly, sitting on the edge of her bed. I noticed her moving farther away at the other side of the bed. Her back facing away from me.

"Just not today, Maxon. I'm not in the mood." She murmured against a pillow.

I crawled towards her side and laid beside her. "Hey, what's the problem? You can tell me." I said softly.

She shook her head, still facing away from me. "I'm just not feeling well."

"Do you want me to get the doctor?" I asked.

"No. I'm ok, I just need to rest."

"You sure?" I just can't help but worry.

"I'm sure."

I decided to check her temperature with my hand but as soon as I touched her, she quickly slapped it away and sat up. "Maxon, what are you doing?!"

"What's wrong?" I said, trying to hide the hurt I felt from her rejection.

"Why are you so god damn persistent? I'm ok, OK? " Her voice sounding annoyed.

I knew it; something was wrong. This wasn't like her. "You're hiding something from me, aren't you?" I questioned.

For a second she froze but then she quickly composed herself and started making up an excuse "I—Why are you so full of yourself?! What makes you think I'm hiding something? The world doesn't revolve around you, Maxon! I don't have anything to say and I don't need to tell you about everything!"

I bit my lips, containing the frustration I felt. "Just tell me, America." I said firmly.

"I'm not hiding anything."

I stood up and combed my hair with my right hand, disgruntled. Why does it always end up like this? As soon as we're settled and fine, this happens. "I'm tired of this, America. Why can't you just simply say it?! Why do you always have to complicate things?! You're so… so-" I withheld my tongue. If I go any further I don't know what I'd be able to say.

"'SO' what?! Well I'm so sorry for making it hard for you, _your highness_." She said sarcastically, bringing emphasis to my title, which resulted to fueling my anger even more.

"God, America why do you have to be so immature?" I rolled my eyes at her.

"ME? Immature? Talk about yourself!" she shouted, her eyes started to brim with tears.

"Stop it, America." I said stiffly.

"NO" She paused. "You stop!"

"Why are you acting like this?" I questioned.

"BECAUSE you won't leave me alone!" she exasperated.

Her words hit me so hard that I felt like my world stopped for a moment. Why doesn't she understand? "Is it wrong, America? You've been away for a week but it felt like a lifetime for me. Since the day you left, you were the only thing I could think of. When it was too much for me, I just stopped thinking; stopped living. My world was shattered and I didn't care; but when you came back. When I saw you in the woods, every ache and hurt I felt during that week, vanished like it never happened. I want to always be with you, is that wrong? Tell me. Is loving wrong?" my voice ending in a faint whisper.

She closed her eyes, as if trying to take control of whatever she felt. She took a big breath before talking again "It isn't, Maxon. Loving I mean. But loving ME is wrong."

I looked at her with confusion. "I've always loved you. Are you telling me, ever since that day I fell in love with you, I was doing something wrong?"

She shook her head and looked at me her eyes filled with despair. "It's not that, Maxon. It wasn't. But you are engaged now! We can't continue on doing this." She reasoned out.

I knew she was right but what can I do? When both my mind and heart was screaming for her? When the only thing withholding me from her, was my duty as a royal and as a ruler of Illea. "I know. I've been trying but I can't, America. I just can't."

She covered her face with her hands and dropped back to her bed. "I knew it was a wrong idea to take this job."

"Don't say that." My voice filled with hurt. I let out a sigh and laid back beside her. I looked at her, who was still covering her eyes. "Hey." I said as I removed one of her hands from her face. She looked at me and I came forward to kiss her. Her eyes widened in shock and then she broke the kiss.

"We haven't done that for a long time." I said, sadly. Recalling the last day of the selection.

"We shouldn't, Maxon." She said, but it somehow sounded like she was telling it to herself.

"We shouldn't" I agreed, as I came closer to her until we were finally breaths apart.

"We shouldn't" She whispered and I finally closed the gap between our lips.

The kiss was slow and steady first but eventually turned out into something more passionate and hungry. I entwined my fingers into her hair and further deepened the kiss. Not getting enough of her. I've missed her so much. The way she smiled. The way she carried herself. The way she joked. The way she made me feel like this. Everything. I've missed everything about her. I broke the kiss and looked into her eyes before finally going further.

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America started crying after we finished, her hands trying to wipe all the tears that fell. I brought her closer to me and hugged her. "What's the problem?"

"This is wrong, Maxon." She cried out. "We shouldn't have done this! Oh god, I'm such a despicable person."

"Don't say that! Don't ever say that. " I pleaded.

"But I am, Maxon!" She looked at me, her eyes very red from all that crying. "She told me to stay away from you but I didn't! And now, we—we've done THIS! What does this make of me?" She sobbed.

"Nothing!" I quickly answered, enveloping her in my arms. "It was me who wanted and initiated it, America. Did Kriss tell you that?"

"It doesn't matter who initiated what. The thing is, I didn't stop you. And so what if it was, Kriss? She has every right to say such things to me." She explained.

Even though what she said was true, I couldn't help but be angry at Kriss. 'Maxon, stop it. Kriss, isn't the problem here it's you.' I told myself. "She should have told me, not you."

She shook her head. "No. She was perfectly right to do so. Let's stop this. We've gone too far, Maxon."

"But—"

"But what? What will this arrangement make of us? If we do continue this, Maxon, what will become of me? A mistress? Do you want me to stoop down that low?" she asked, her voice trembling.

"No. No. I wouldn't let that happen!" I cried.

"Then let's stop this." She concluded. "That's all I've been asking for. Let's not complicate things any further or else we'll just end up hurting each other."

I felt weak and helpless. She was right. How can I be this selfish? I would never let her stoop down to such a level. I cupped her face and give her one last kiss, before nodding in agreement. "You're right."

She smiled at me, a tear cascaded down her right cheek.

"I love you, America." _I don't want to end this. Not ever. _

"I love you too" She replied. "Good bye, Maxon."

I closed my eyes, trying to contain the storm of emotions inside of me. "Good bye." I smiled weakly.

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I went back to my room afterwards. I saw a pen and paper lying on my desk, and started writing. I was writing to no one in particular. I just had to.

_Love isn't everything as people think it is. But it can be 'everything' to a person. Sometimes no matter how much you fight for it, you'll still lose. Sometimes, no matter how much you love, it will never be given to you. This is the reality._

_Love can bring bliss and pain to a person. It can either make or break you. For me, it was both. SHE transformed me. Changed me into a person that I would want to be, a person who could stand on his own. A person with moral. A person who had sympathy and empathy. A person who could and knew how to love. She made my world. She made me realize what being alive truly meant._

_But now that it was time to stop what we had, it feels as if a huge chunk of me was taken away. It's painful to think we can never be together. It feels as if I'm drowning; like I'm dying. Like suddenly I've realized that no matter how much I walked inside a tunnel, I can never see the light. But even though I'm aching so much right now, I'm still happy to love—to have loved HER, and not anyone else._

_I find it amusing, how love comes in unexpected ways. You cannot choose who to love, you cannot force yourself to love someone, at the same time you cannot force someone to love you. But once you do fall, you just cannot stop it. No matter how much you resist. You fall. And for me, I fell really hard._

_I don't know how to stop this feeling. It's as if someone told me to stop the works of gravity. I love her and only her. I'll try to resist but I know, that no matter what, I wouldn't be able to and I will still keep on falling._


	14. Chapter 14

**Finally I was able to find time to make another chapter! Lot of stuff going on, I really don't know when I'll be able to post another one.**

**Anyway hope you like this chapter! You guys are probably thinking " I knew it! My predictions were right!" /:) lol Please review! :D **

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-America's POV-

Two weeks. Ever since that night, Maxon never came back to my room. If ever we would come across each other he'd greet me like how he would to everyone else while I would force myself to act normally. 'Is it that easy for him to move on?' I thought. 'No. Of course not. How could you think like that, America? We're just pretty much in the same position. It's a matter of who could put on a better mask.' I looked up at the ceiling fan and watched it spin. I was about to drift into another world when someone came knocking at the door.

"Lady America, it's Anne. I brought breakfast for you." Anne said through the door. I stood up from my bed and went to upon the door for her. She came in with a big tray of food in her hands and laid it on my study stable. "You haven't been eating well ever since you came back here. Did you know how thin you've become?! Every time we would tailor a dress for you, you'd measure less and less each time. I know I'm in no position, Miss, but we're just really worried of you." Anne explained, looking down.

I felt guilty. I should at least take care of my health for these girls. I let out a sigh and looked at the tray of food. "Ok, I'll eat." I smiled. She looked at me skeptically. "—And try to finish all of these" I laughed.

"That's good news! I thought you were going to be stubborn." She chuckled. I rolled my eyes playfully and grabbed the fork diving into the scrambled eggs. I looked at Anne, who looked really adorable as she anticipated for me to take a bite. As soon as I placed the scramble egged in my mouth, I wanted to vomit it out. I was never picky with food, and I never really had problems with eggs but this was different. It tasted horrible in ways I can't explain. I ran to the bathroom and threw it all up.

"Are you alright?" Anne came running, worry plastered all over her face. "Is—is there something wrong with the food?"

"I—I don't know" I said weakly. "Can you check the scrambled eggs for me, Anne?"

She nodded and went quickly to the tray and grabbed an unused fork. I watched her as she took a bite. She looked at me in confusion. "There's nothing wrong with it, Lady America."

"Really?" I asked.

"Really." She replied. "Do you want me to get you a doctor?"

I shook my head. I don't ever want to see a doctor in my whole life, much more a hospital. "No. I'm ok. Maybe it's because I've not been eating for a while. But seriously, I'm really ok." I flexed my arms, trying to lighten the mood but Anne was still not convinced.

"If you're sure… Do you want me to get you something else?" She asked.

I shook my head again. "Oh no. That's a waste of food. I'll just eat this. Don't worry. Maybe what happened earlier was a glitch." I laughed but she didn't. I let out a sigh and looked at her. "I'm really ok. I promise I'll try eating all of this. Just try though." I smiled. "You should go back to your other duties, I've been holding you back for some time already."

"Oh no, Lady America. You are our priority, we're your maids remember?" She replied.

"Don't say that." I said aloud. "You, girls, are my friends."

She smiled at me. "We know, miss."

I stretched my body just to show I was fine already. "Anyway." I said in a singsong manner. "You should really go. I think it will help me concentrate in eating if I'm alone."

She finally gave in and nodded. "Actually I have quite a lot of things to do, today." She confessed.

"Go then." I gave her a smile of encouragement.

"Thank you, miss." She replied, smiling also. She looked at the tray of food as if pondering. "Are you sure you don't want me to replace the food?"

"I'm sure."

She nodded slowly, still somewhat unconvinced and gave me one last wave of good bye before heading out. When I was finally alone I want closer to the tray of food, and stared into the scrambled eggs. "Not going to eat that though." I murmured. I looked at the other food in the tray; there were some bread, fruits and nuts, but when I came across to the sight of pork sausages, I felt nausea and repulse. I felt like hurling all over again. I brought my hand to my mouth, trying to contain whatever it is I was about to do and ran to the bathroom again to do it there.

I washed my face and looked at the mirror. My face was very pale and I felt really horrible. 'What is happening to me?' I thought and then it dawned to me. I quickly counted the days that have passed since I last had my period. I was delayed, for a MONTH. 'How could I not have noticed that!' I screamed internally. It explained everything. Why sometimes I felt dizzy all of a sudden. Why there were days that I felt too sick to even leave the room. Why I changed moods quickly.

The fact is, I was pregnant; have been pregnant for more than a month, if I counted it right. "How could this have happened? It's impossible, Dr. Matthew said..." I said shakily. No. 'It wasn't not possible. He said to me the chances were slim to none but it's not impossible.'

I collapse to the side of the sink. 'We did it a lot after we did it the first time.' I blushed furiously by the thought of the number of times we did it.

"No wonder I got pregnant." I laughed shakily. 'America, how could you find humour in such a situation?' But it was just ridiculous how I ended up pregnant. 'Well Maxon was pretty much to blame, with all his mischievous room visits and man urges.' I thought.

Maxon. I closed my eyes as I tried to contain whatever emotions were playing on me right now. He can't know. Not ever. If I told him about this, his resolve may crumble. I can't do that, not when we were finally able to let go. Not when I put him through such pains.

"Who am I kidding? I'm doing this for me." I whispered. It wasn't about him. I want to keep this baby. If he knew about it, he would protest against it and may be—he might force me to get rid of it. I can't. I just can't. I know I'm being stupidly selfish right now but how can I get rid of something that I saw as a blessing; a gift? Something that was conceived out of love? I want to take all risks even though the odds were pretty much against me.

It's dangerous. I know. Dr. Matthew said I couldn't; that pregnancy was almost impossible and that I would most likely die from giving birth. Everything was against me but maybe I could hope, just like how I got pregnant, maybe it was possible. Maybe I might be able to fight against all odds. I smiled to myself, my resolve more firm as ever. I stood up and went back to my bedroom. I picked up the tray of food.

"No use of keeping this if I won't be able to eat it." I sighed. "I'll just ask for something simpler and with less grease." I started walking towards the door when I stumbled on a rug and dropped the tray I was holding. Everything shattered. Not a single glassware unbroken.

"How can I be this clumsy?" I mumbled to myself as I picked up the pieces. When everything was placed in the tray again, I headed to the kitchen and placed the tray on the table. Anne was there helping preparing lunch. She looked at me, her eyes wide.

"What happened here?!" She ran towards me, wiping her hands on her apron.

"Uhmm… I dropped it because of my clumsiness." I explained shamefully. She checked me out as if I was the broken glassware. "I'm ok. I'm sure."

"You said that earlier and look what happened." She sighed.

"Hey, I just accidentally dropped it!" I said in defense.

"What would, Prince Maxon, do to me if something happens to you?!" Her eyes grew wide in exclamation, as if Maxon would do something horrendous to her.

Maxon. He mustn't know. "Please don't tell him about this and what happened earlier." I pleaded.

"Why not, Miss?" She questioned, her brows furrowed down.

"I don't want him to worry. He has already too much to handle with all the running-the-whole-country thing. I don't want to add up to his burdens." I said. And I really meant it this time.

"You won't be. He'd never think of you as a burden." She said, placing a hand on top of mine.

I looked straight at her, my eyes pleading. "Just this once. Please?" I said, softly, almost like child.

She let out a sigh and nodded. "I still think we should tell him though."

I smiled and went to hug her. "Thank you so much."

"Anything for you, Miss." She said as she hugged me back.

I moved backwards so that I was facing her. "Actually, I do have a favour to ask… if it's not too much."

"What is it?"

"Uhm… Can you have someone from the outside tell Georgia that I need to talk to her? Do you know anyone who can do that?" I asked, hopefully.

She was quiet for a while, thinking deeply. She looked at me and smiled. "I know someone."

I squeezed her hands. "Thank you so much. How can I ever repay you?"

"Well, for starters you can start by eating." She chuckled. "Tell me what you want."

"How is that repaying you?" I said, puzzled.

"It will!" She laughed. "You don't know how stressed me, Mary and Lucy were because you didn't eat properly."

"Sorry." I said guiltily.

She waved her hands. "Nonsense. Just tell me what you want and I'll make it for you."

I pondered, thinking about what I was craving for. "Oh!" I exclaimed, all giddy all of a sudden. "I want strawberry tarts! Can you add some honey and chocolate on top and then powder it with some sugar." My eyes were sparkling by the thought of it.

Anne looked at me in astonishment. "Are you sure you're ok, Miss?"

I rolled my eyes and chuckled. "A 100 percent sure."

"Ok, this might take a while though. I'll just go bring it to your room. Is that ok?"

"It's ok." I smiled and gave her a wave of goodbye before finally going.

.

.

"I came here as soon as I heard you were looking for me." Georgia said, closing the door of my room.

"Does Maxon know you're here?" I asked.

"No. Not even the palace guards." She replied. I gave out a sigh of relief and slumped myself on to the bed. "So why did you call for me?"

I'm no longer going to beat around the bush. I'm tired of it. "I'm pregnant, Georgia."

She froze for a while and then confusion started to plaster all ever her place. "But you told me… how?"

"You know how." I blushed furiously and so did she afterwards.

"That's not what I was asking, you know!" She defended.

I chuckled "I know but I just don't know how to answer that. I'm just oblivious as you are."

We were quiet for a while before she spoke again. "Did you tell Maxon about this?"

"No!" I said quickly, almost like a shout.

"Why not?" She asked, confused.

"He won't want it." I explained.

She shook her head, and looked at me as if stating the obvious. "America, you know how dangerous pregnancy is for you. Of course, he wouldn't want it. If I was in his position. I would feel the same way."

"I know but I still want to keep it." I said sadly.

"But you can't, America. That's suicide." She said, sitting beside me.

"I know but I can't do that, Georgia. This baby, I want to keep it. Even if the chances where none. I just can't. This baby, I want to fight for him or her. I want to give this baby a chance. Please understand." I said meaningfully.

She shook her head. "No, America. This is wrong. I know where you're coming from, but this is just not right."

"What is right, then? Abort the baby so that I could live? Is that what's right?" My eyes started to water.

She looked at me, pleading me to understand but I didn't want to. "You both won't live if you decided to keep it anyways." She explained.

I shook my head. "No no no. You don't know that! I got pregnant when the doctor said the chances were slim. May be, just maybe I might live it through. Don' you think?"

"I don't know, America."

"I'm not asking you anymore to think the same, I just want you to help. Just this once." I pleaded, tears falling down my face.

She gave me a shrug of defeat and looked straight at me. "How can I help you?"

"I can't stay here any longer. People would notice. Maxon would notice." I explained. "I need to move out of here as soon as possible. Hopefully without Maxon, knowing."

"How can you do that to him?" her voice filled with disappointment. "Can't he at least know you're going?"

I shook my head. "He'll ask. He'll know. He always does."

* * *

-Maxon's POV-

"What do you mean she left?" I chocked. "Why didn't I know about this? Tell me!" I shouted at one of the guards.

"Sir, we are deeply sorry, we thought you knew. She left early in the morning. Her mentor, Miss Georgia, said that all of America's papers were finalized and that she will finally assume the position of representative." A guard said, monotonously.

"We really thought you knew." Another guard agreed.

"But I didn't!" I shouted furiously. "How can these kinds of important matters go about in the palace without me knowing?!"

The guards kept quiet, while I was still very much shaking from anger. "Get out." I said shakily and then looked at them, one by one. "Get out." I said more firmly, gritting my teeth. And so they did.

I collapsed onto the office chair. Tears finally streaming down my face. "I wasn't even able to say good bye." I chocked. How can she do this? She should have at least told me.


	15. Chapter 15

**Hey guys! Sorry not updating as frequently. Please bare with me, I'll try to update more often/make the chapters a bit longer, once all my workloads lighten up. Thanks by the way for all the reviews! **

**And as always, hope you enjoy this chapter. :)**

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-Maxon's POV-

"It's been a while, Georgia?" I forced a smile. 6 weeks had passed ever since they left without a word. I knew something wasn't right. It was too sketchy that they had to leave immediately without even notifying me, especially when I was the head of the caste project. It's ridiculous how it took me almost a week to figure it out. I was too broken, too shattered when she left. I didn't want to think at all but then I remembered. I remembered that day when she was fighting between life and death, and I told her that I'd still want her—love her, no matter how many times she broke my heart; and it still stands very true today and forever. 'I have to find her, no matter what.' is the only thing I could think of afterwards.

For 4 weeks there was nothing. No one knew where they were, and from that all my suspicions were right. If America had been doing her job as a representative then she should have been within the circumference of the lower caste areas. A lot of people should have known where she was but when we started the search, not a single soul knew. It was as if they were hiding. Knowing this it fueled me more to find her.

"It sure has..." Georgia said awkwardly.

"Where is she?" I asked her, trying to contain whatever emotions were playing on me right now. I have to focus. I don't have much time left before…

"I don't know who you are talking about." She answered back, her voice unsteady as she diverted her eyes from mine.

I bit my lower lips and breathed deeply. "I don't have time for this, Georgia. Where is, AMERICA?"

"I—I don't know." She stuttered.

I laughed cynically. "You've got to be kidding me." I gritted through my teeth. "I don't have time to play games with you, just tell it to me, if not as a confidant, then as the future ruler of this god damn country." I hate to be like this. To be someone who exerted his authority on someone lower than him but I was getting desperate.

She didn't answer, her body was almost quivering from fright. 'What am I doing? I wasn't like this. No matter the situation I shouldn't act this way. What happened to me?' I let out a sigh of frustration and combed through my hair. "I'm sorry, Georgia, I never meant to frighten you. I just want to see her." I said softly. "So please. Please do tell me." My eyes pleaded.

She looked at me, her body finally relaxing. "I'm sorry Maxon, I'm in no position to tell you. It's up to America to decide if she still wants to see you or not." She said sadly.

I didn't know when it started, but tears started to well on my eyes. "I know." I closed my eyes and let the tears that have formed cascade down my cheeks before continuing. "but I just don't have much time left, Georgia."

"What do you mean by that?" She questioned, her eyes filled with puzzlement.

I cleared my throat and looked straight at her. "I can't bide anymore time." I choke out. "The people are clamoring for me to step up from my position and be king." I paused. "Which means I have to get married before or in line with the coronation night."

She froze, as if processing the connection of what I've said. "When is it? The coronation I mean?"

"A week from now." I looked down at my shoes and fisted my hands. "I have to marry Kriss before or on the day itself." I looked up again, trying to fight off the tears that threatened to fall down. "I just want to see her one last time. I want to formally say good bye and just let go of these feelings." I lied. The truth is I wanted to see her so that she could tell me not to marry Kriss. To tell me that all that mattered was this love we had. To tell me I could be selfish just this once. To tell me that she still loves me. To tell HER that she was the only One; the only one I truly and will only love.

"Don't you think that's pretty selfish of you?" She said, her voice rising a little bit. "Have you ever thought about how America would feel? Have you!" She shouted. "Dammit, to think America has been suffering for a self-centered guy like you. I shouldn't have pitied you when we left that day." She mumbled.

"What did you say?" I quickly asked. "What do you mean by America's suffering?!"

She looked straight at me, her glare menacing. "So now you're concerned about her when a while ago you were only thinking of making yourself feel better, huh?" she spat.

I shook my head. "No, that's not what I meant."

"So what did you truly mean? I'm SO sorry, Prince Maxon, for being SO dense." She said sarcastically.

"I don't want to marry Kriss. I really don't but I have to. I don't have a choice." I said almost to myself.

"There's always a choice, you know." She talked back.

"What other choices do I have? If not Kriss then someone else. Royals don't have much of a choice!" I defended.

She looked at me as if I said the stupidest thing ever, and maybe I did. "You almost sound like your father."

I breathed out. I can't burst out right now. "Don't provoke me, Georgia."

She raised her eyebrows at me. "Me, provoke you? Are you threatening me? You're worse than I thought! To think August and I thought you were fit to be the ruler of this country, we were obviously wrong." She exasperated. "I can't stay here any longer. Bind me if you want but I'll never tell you." She spat.

"If not her location just tell me how is she? What do you mean by America's suffering?" I pleaded.

She ignored me and started walking away. I panicked and grabbed onto her right hand. She glared at me and slapped my hand away.

"Please, Georgia. I don't know what to say anymore. I'm a mess right now. My mind's a mess right now." I confessed.

She faced my way and then pursed her lips, infuriated. "Stop making so many excuses, Maxon! Is that how you plan to handle things when you did something wrong? Huh?!"

I shook my head. "No, no. If course not."

She gave me a shrug. "I've had enough of this." She said.

I was scared that she would start to walk away again and so I grabbed into the hem of her shirt. Without thinking I suddenly kneeled down before her. Lowering myself. I felt so little, so vulnerable but I'd do everything. Everything just to be with America or even to just see her. "Please." I chocked and looked straight at her eyes, begging. "I beg of you."

She stared at me in disbelief. "What are you doing, Maxon. Stand up."

I shook my head. "I won't."

"Do you realize what you are doing at all?! You are going to be King. You shouldn't kneel to someone like me!" She let out.

"But I don't know what to do anymore. You won't tell me about America." It's ridiculous how I'm acting like a kid right now.

She looked at me with disbelief. "Why would you go to such a level if you don't—" she paused as if she realized something. "You were lying earlier weren't you? You never meant to let her go. But Maxon—"

"I love her." I said aloud. " I love her" I said again, more firmly.

"But you can't" She said, her eyes filled with sadness. She was finally understanding me.

"I can't but I still do. I don't know what to do, Georgia. How do I fight? How do I make it a happy ending for us?" I said, my voice trembling. I honestly don't know.

She closed her eyes as tears cascaded down her face. "I'm sorry. I don't know. This is just too tragic. You guys don't deserve to experience this."

"It's what we are faced with." I looked straight at her. "But I still want to fight though. I never meant to let her go. Not ever. Even when we said good bye, I never truly meant it but then she left. I was shattered, Georgia. She let 'us' go, but do you know what's crazy? I still can't. I'd fight for her even if she stopped fighting for me."

She looked at me tenderly. "She still loves you, Maxon. Don't ever think that she let you go because she didn't love you enough; she did it because she loves you so much."

"But she still did." I said sadly.

"She did it because—" she paused as if she was about to say something she shouldn't have.

"Because?" I urged.

"Nevermind. It's not for me to say." She mumbled.

I held gently onto her hands. "Just this once, Georgia."

She closed her eyes, contemplating. "I don't know, Maxon."

"Please." I said desperately.

"America, she's—" she paused, struggling to say whatever it was.

"She's what?'

She cleared her throat and looked at me, still struggling. "She's pregnant, Maxon."

I froze. "You-You're kidding right?"

She didn't answer but instead just shook her head.

"But she can't. She told me. You know about it right? She can't have a baby, that's why we can't be together in the first place." I said to the both of us.

"You and I know very much what the doctor said. The chances were so slim but miraculously she still got pregnant. Well, with your amazing help though."

I blushed, crimson and was about to retort back but then I realized something. "She can't be pregnant." I uttered.

"Trust me, she is." She said, her voice annoyed from my disbelief.

"That's not what I meant. She can't BE pregnant. Her body can't take the stress. Do you know that?" I asked, my voice trembling a little bit.

"I—I know. I told her but she still persisted on keeping it. I don't have the right to stop her." She uttered.

"How long has she been pregnant?" No. No. This can't be happening.

"Uhm... I think for more than two months already?"

"For more than two months!" I repeated, my voice filled with horror. "Georgia, do you know how dangerous it is for her?"

"I think I do, from what she told."

"She can die!" I shouted.

"I know!" she shouted back. "but what can I do? Her resolve. I can't change it, Maxon. Not me."

I breathed in and out, trying to calm down as my body shook in fear. "I'm begging you, please I need to see her. I need to change her mind. I—I can't lose her. Not anymore. So please Georgia." My voice said desperately.

She let out a sigh before responding. "Ok."


	16. Chapter 16

**It's been what? A week since I last uploaded a new chapter? I'm really sorry :( How I wish it was summer all over again for me, so that I'll be able to write as much as I wanted to. Oh well, say hi to reality.**

**Putting that aside, hope you enjoy this chapter!**

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-America's POV-

I suddenly felt a chill ran through me so I brought my blanket closer. I knew it would be hard but knowing doesn't mean it will be easier. I felt really awful. The first two months were bearable but now that I'm in my third month, I started to feel the stress of pregnancy. I didn't have any energy to do anything. I was very moody, and I hated it. It didn't also help that everything started to feel really painful, not only my back but most especially my abdomen. _'My abdomen'_ I though, brushing my hands on it gently. The last time I checked it, it was swelling a bit and was bruised. I can't bring myself to check it now, because I knew it would look worse than before.

"Six more months. You can do this, America." I told myself, only half-believing. If it comes to such a point that I couldn't take it anymore, I just don't know what I'd do. The only thing I truly know is that I won't ever give up on my baby. Not ever. I just can't think of how I'll live it through if something bad happens to my baby. I'd rather die than lose him/her.

I gave out a sigh. 'Stop thinking like this. You are a fighter, America.' I curled myself in bed and decided to rest when someone knocked at the door. "Come in!" I said, not even bothering to open my eyes and face the doorway.

"America?"

I suddenly froze. No. It's impossible. I quickly sat up and shifted myself to see if I heard wrong but I wasn't. "Maxon." I let out, my eyes widened in shock. "How did you—" Before I could finish my sentence he came to me and embraced me. His whole body was trembling. I know I should be pushing him away but I couldn't. I just miss him so much. Seeing him. Feeling him. His warmth. Everything. For the past 3 months I've been trying to move on and just lock away these feelings and memories about him.

"I thought I'd never see you." He said, his voice trembling.

"How did you know?" I forced myself to ask.

"Georgia." He looked at me, his face suddenly became serious even though his eyes were very red. "Georgia told me, America."

I looked at him in bewilderment.

"Everything." He added.

It took me a few seconds before it all clicked in. "NO." How could Georgia do this to me? I trusted her. I could feel my face flush with anger. He'll try to stop me. He'll try to take away my baby. I suddenly felt defensive. "Get away from me." I said, my voice low.

"America—" before he could say anything else, I pushed him off the bed. My eyes started to well with tears. "Get out, Maxon. I don't want to hear anything from you!" And it was true. I can't take it… If he told me to get rid of my baby.

I knew he would disagree, anyone would, but it's still very different and painful if you hear it come out from the mouth of the person you love and who you thought would understand you and trust your decisions.

"America, just hear me out." He pleaded.

I closed my eyes, letting the tears roll down my face and shook my head. "No. I've had enough of people telling me what I should do."

I heard him stand up and move towards me once again. I felt him sit at the edge of my bed and place a hand on my face, slightly caressing his thumb on my cheek. "America, please look at me." He said softly.

I slowly opened my eyes and looked at him, just as he told me so.

"I love you." He said and paused, his face grew even sadder. "You have to stop this. We can't keep the baby even if we wanted to. I just don't want to lose you. I just can't. I hope you understand where I'm coming from."

"No. I don't understand! How can you say that, Maxon? Just because you don't want to lose me, you're going to sacrifice our baby?! Is that it?!" I shouted. 'Why is it no one understands me? Who will fight for my baby, if not me?' I thought angrily.

"That's not what I meant, America. Do you honestly believe I'd want our baby gone?" His voice rising at every word.

"No… " I looked down. I fisted my hands and looked at him accusingly. "But that doesn't change the fact that you would want me to get the baby aborted!"

"America, you know what Dr. Matthew said. You can't keep the baby. It's too dangerous. You can't live through the pregnancy, much more try on giving birth." He reasoned out.

"You don't know that! I might just live it through." I let out, more determined to make a point. "Didn't Dr. Matthew say there's a slim chance I'd get pregnant but look at me now." I brought my hands towards my abdomen, showing my baby bump. "I am pregnant for THREE MONTHS. Isn't it a miracle, Maxon?"

He pursed his lips, his eyes filled with despair. "It is. If circumstances were different, I'd be ecstatic but America, it's your life that's at stake here."

"I know." I simply said and removed his hand from my face. "But what if? What if I live it through?"

"You don't know that."

I looked straight at him. "I don't; but you don't know also."

"Please understand, America. You're risking your life here!"

I've had enough of this. I breathed deeply, trying to calm myself. "Do you think I don't know that?" I squinted my eyes. "I know the risks! I'm the one who told you about them!" I reminded him. "But even so, I would still keep this baby, Maxon. No matter what. It's my body! Don't you think I deserve to make this decision?"

"but what about me, America? Where do I fit in? What if—what if Dr. Matthew was right? Don't you think I also deserve to be part of this decision you are making?" He said, tears cascading down his face. I hated to see him like this. I wish I could make him understand.

An idea materialized in my head. It was ridiculous but I was desperate. I let out a sigh, held his hands and then brought them to my stomach. He looked at me with puzzlement. "Can you feel it, Maxon?" I asked, my eyes pleading for him to understand. "It's just been 3 months but our baby has grown this much. Isn't it amazing?" I breathed out. "We made this, Maxon. We brought another life into the world, from our love. We made this happen." My eyes started to tear up once again. "I love this baby, even if I hadn't seen him or her yet. And I love this baby much more because it was from you Maxon; It was YOU who made it possible for me—for this baby".

"America—"

"Maxon, I'm not asking you to take responsibility. I won't bother you or ask anything from you. Just please, let me keep this baby." I pleaded, my voice sounding very desperate. "Please. I—I'll even go to a faraway place where no one knows about me if that's what you're worried about."

He suddenly looked at me in disbelief and hurt. "Is that how you see, me? Do you think that I don't want to take responsibility? Do you think I care about what people think about me?! Am I that of a heartless and selfish man to you?! " He let out, his voice filled with pain. "America, I love you. I've said that so many times. Why don't you understand? I want you to be safe, that's why I don't want you to keep the baby. You're that important to me—so much more than having an heir to the throne"

"This baby, Maxon." I looked straight at him. "is all I have. I'm left with nothing without him or her. He—she's the only thing that makes me want to live. Please don't take that away from me." I pleaded.

He looked tenderly at me and brushed the hair that fell down, away from my face. "You still have me, America."

I shook my head. "No. I don't. You have Kriss."

"I don't love her." he defended.

"It doesn't matter. You still have to marry her or someone else." We were silent for a while before I decided to speak again. "I'm keeping this baby, no matter what you say or anyone says. That's my final decision and it won't ever change." I said firmly.

He gave out breath of defeat, knowing that he won't be able to do anything. "Ok then."

I was confused for a moment. I thought he'd continue to argue. "Really?" I asked in disbelief.

"Really."

"Ok." I said awkwardly, not knowing what to say or how to react.

"But—" he stopped and looked straight into my eyes.

"But what?" I urged. Deep inside I was overwhelmed. 'He's going to let me keep you.' I told my baby. I couldn't help but smile by the thought of it.

"You have to stay in the palace." He stated.

"What?!" I said in horror, my heart stopping for a moment. "Maxon, Kriss wouldn't—" He cut me off before I could continue.

"and I am not marrying Kriss."

"Maxon—"

"You've made your decision and I agreed to it. I'm making mine, America."

I shook my head in disagreement. "But the people!"

"To hell with the people! America, you're pregnant for pete's sake! The baby." He looked at my stomach. "He/she's not only yours but mine also. I also want to take responsibility."

" And you still can, Maxon! Even without breaking your engagement with Kriss." I reasoned.

"America, the reason why I'm engaged to Kriss is because you told me we can't be together; because I needed an heir and you can't provide me with that, which in my defense, I never really cared about. But you are pregnant NOW. So why can't we still be together?" He asked, sounding like a little boy.

"Because I'm an 'uncertainty', Maxon. We can't really say that I—I'll be able to have a successful pregnancy. You can't risk the country's future for me." I reasoned more, even though all I wanted was to be his.

"I'm done with all that, America. We've been through a lot of pain just for this damn country. I've sacrifice enough. I've done enough. I don't want to sacrifice anymore. I want to find our happy ending this time. Not anyone else. Not the people's. Not the country's. But OURS." He brought a hand to my right cheek and wiped away the tears before kissing me.

The kiss was brief but it meant so much to the both of us. He placed his forehead against mine and spoke, his lips brushing mine. "I want to keep both of you safe. I want to make sure you both will make it through." he said, his voice shaking a bit. He then moved backwards so that he could look into my eyes. "So please, go back to the palace. You're pregnant even though you shouldn't be. The palace can provide you with a greater chance of surviving. America, I can't lose you." He pleaded. "I can't lose you and the baby." He smiled sadly.

I can't describe everything that I was feeling right now. It was so overwhelming. For the first time for a very long time, I was crying out of relief; out if happiness. I wasn't alone in this fight anymore. I wiped my tears away and nodded.

He encircled me with his hands and brought me towards him, embracing me. "I love you, America."

I chuckled and hugged him back. "You've been saying that ever since you got here. Don't you get tired?"

I could feel him shake his head. "Not ever."

"Me also." How can someone love me this much?

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How can **I** love someone this much?


	17. Chapter 17

**No. I'm not yet dead. LOL. Sorry haven't updated for almost 4 weeks, had a lot of papers to finish (and still not yet finished). Anyways hope you guys enjoy this chapter! Please review if you have time. Thank you so much! Never expected anyone would want to read my fics. BTW, we're nearing the ending! (I think? Lol)**

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-America's POV-

Once again, I was back in the palace. I could feel myself quiver as I stared into the palace doors. I couldn't help but fear and worry. What would the people say when they notice my bulging stomach? When they learn that I'm pregnant? What would Kriss do? I can't help but be filled with fear. "I don't think this is a good idea." I whispered to myself. Maxon must have heard me. He held my shaking hands, slightly caressing them. I looked at him shyly and saw his eyes fill with tenderness and assurance.

"It's going to be ok, America." He said, squeezing my hands a bit. "I won't let anything happen to you. I promise." He further assured.

I just nodded and gave out a sigh. 'You can do this America.' I told myself.

"Ready." He asked.

"Well, even if I say I'm not we still have to go in, anyways." I joked but my voice evidently nervous.

"You have a point." He chuckled. He signaled the palace guards to open the door. He entwined his right hand with my left and led me into the palace. Even though I was so worried a while ago, all I could think of now is how warm and sturdy his hand felt against mine. I'm no longer alone in this fight, he'll always be there for me. I know that now.

It felt like déjà vu again, Kriss was running down the staircase all ecstatic until she saw us—ME. Her face contoured in horror as she glanced upon our entwined hands. Out of guilt, I tried to pull my hands away but Maxon held me tighter. "Let go, Maxon." I whispered.

"No, I allowed you to let go of my hands last time. I won't ever let that happen again." He whispered back, never stopping for a breath.

"What is she doing here?" Kriss finally asked, frustration evident in her voice. She shifted her direction from Maxon to me as she walked closer and closer to us and I couldn't help but feel weak and vulnerable. Without knowing it, my mother instincts kicked in and so I held my stomach in defense. She noticed my unusual actions which made her look down at my stomach. Her eyes grew big in realization.

"You-you're…" She chocked out and looked at me with horror.

"I can explain—" Maxon tried to cut but Kriss was faster.

"How could you, America." She asked, her voice filled with hurt and venom.

"It's not her fault." Maxon defended but it looked like Kriss couldn't hear him. It seems as if she blocked out everything else and it was only me, she was seeing and hearing.

"Even though the selection was already over, you still didn't give up, did you?" She accused.

"Kriss, I didn't mean to…" I tried to explain but she didn't allow me so.

"YOU DIDN'T MEAN TO?" She said in disbelief and laughed cynically. "That is the most pathetic excuse I have ever heard. Is that the best excuse you could think of, America?" She challenged. It was very apparent that her emotions have overcome her. She was shaking in anger, and it scared me. Maxon pulled me to his side so that he could stand in-between me and Kriss.

"Kriss, calm down." Maxon said, his voice careful.

"CALM DOWN?! How dare you say that, Maxon!" She exclaimed. "What have ever done to you, for you to hurt and play with me like this?!" Her voice rising at every word and ended with a whisper of "I loved you."

I couldn't help but feel the crashing guilt. If only Kriss was a bad person. If only she was mean to me, it would have been easier to deal with this, but she wasn't. She always played fair and was kind and pure in heart. 'What did Maxon ever see in me?' I thought, tears starting to form on my eyes, as our conversation started to heat up. "I'm so sorry, Kriss." I chocked. I couldn't say anything else. She deserved to be angry.

"Sorry?" She said sarcastically. "Do you think sorry is all it takes from what you did to me?" She squinted her eyes.

"I—I don't know what to say anymore." I said honestly and bobbed my head down, letting the tears fall down.

"Of course you don't!" She shouted in anger and stormed towards me. Maxon was startled and wasn't able to recover quickly as Kriss slapped me. "Yo-You whore!"

* * *

-Maxon's POV-

It took all my energy and will to resist from doing anything bad to Kriss. My whole face felt scorching hot as my blood boiled. I know she wasn't herself right now just like how I was when I learned about Aspen and America, but I can't help but feel hatred. "Stop it, Kriss." I warned, my voice low as I held tightly the hand that slapped America and pulled it away from America.

"Why?" She cried out. "Why are you siding with her?"

I let out a sigh of frustration before looking into her eyes. "I don't know how to make things better but I'll just tell the truth to you anyways." I waited for her to give some kind of response before continuing but she didn't. "Kriss, I—I don't love you the way you wanted me to; the way that you love me."

"But you chose me?" she questioned, her eyes starting to fill up with tears.

I pursed my lips and breathed deeply. "I did but—" I looked at America. "she has always been my pick, ever since the beginning."

Kriss looked at me in bewilderment, her tears cascading down her face. "I'm confused. Why me then?"

"Because we didn't have a choice. I couldn't pick, America." I explained, but it obviously made things more confusing.

"Why?" she asked. "And what makes this time different?"

I closed my eyes for a moment, trying to clear and rearrange my thoughts and then looked at America. I don't want her to hear anything further because I know she'll try to blame everything on herself; I can't ever fathom that. "America, you should go back to your room."

She shook her in disagreement. "I can't leave you here."

"When have you ever?" Kriss talked back as she rolled her eyes.

I let her gesture pass and just focused on America. "Please, just for today. You need to rest." I pleaded. "For the baby." I whispered to her.

She gave in and nodded. I give her hand one last squeeze of assurance before letting it go and watched her disappear along the corridors before looking back at Kriss. She raised her eyebrows, expecting me to continue where we left off.

"Remember the final selection? When the rebels came in?" I started.

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~insert all of the events that happened~

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"I'm really sorry, Kriss. Nothing can make up to what I did to you. You don't deserve this." I ended.

"I don't." She said, more to herself. We were silent for a while. before Kriss decided to talk again, she wiped her tears away. "Can I just do one more thing before I leave this place?"

"Of course. Anything." I responded.

She stared into my eyes and for a moment I thought she was going to kiss me which made me want to take back what I said, but she didn't. Instead she clenched her fist and slapped me hard on my right cheek. It stung. I never knew she could hit that hard.

"That makes us even." She said. "Well, not really. Not ever."

"Yeah." I agreed, placing my hand where she hit me.

"Well... I should probably go home now. I don't have anything to do here and I miss my family really bad, anyways." She admitted.

I couldn't say anything else and just simply nodded. She gave out a breath before speaking again. "I won't say you did nothing wrong but I feel awfully bad for what I did and said to America. She's pregnant and sensitive, and yet I let my emotions get to me. Can you say that I'm sorry?"

"Do you want to talk to her" I asked.

"No. Not now. I still can't… I'm sorry." She replied.

"I understand. I'll escort you outside." I offered, smiling sadly.

"Stop doing that." She said.

"Doing what?"

"Being that nice. Girls, always fall for that. well, I do."

"I—" I was speechless.

Kriss chuckled at my inability to think of anything to say. "I was kidding. Anyway, take care of America and stop being so nice to girls! Do you want America to worry about those matters?"

I shook my head. "Never."

"Well, that's settled then... So going back to what you offered earlier, care to lead me out of the palace, Your Highness?" She joked.

"Politely" I added and laughed.

* * *

**_A week later_**

-still Maxon's POV-

"Why are we doing this? Isn't it weird?" America said while her maids were helping her dress up. I studied her. Her hair was tied in a tight bun and her body was adorned with a loose pure white gown with intricate flower designs, concealing her baby bump. She looked the most beautiful, I've ever seen. Warmth spread throughout my whole body. I've waited so long for this day to come. I was drifting away further into my thoughts when she spoke again "Don't you think it's too fast?"

I raised my brows. "Fast? We've been held up so many times by circumstances. This wedding is long due." I smiled sadly, remembering all the events, secrets and revelations that unfolded.

She shook her head. "You know that's not what I meant. The country is most probably confused about the turn of events with Kriss and then now, we're going to get married? The people might lose trust in you, Maxon."

I gave out a sigh and brushed through my hair. I walked towards her while her maids made way for me. "Didn't I tell you? I don't care about that anymore. I care about you." I said, brushing the tips of my finger along her cheeks. "And anyways, we're going to get married sooner or later. It's better we get married now when we can still hide the baby bump."

She looked down and nodded. "You're right. I—I'm just a little bit anxious."

"Me also but I'm so happy that this is finally happening." I admitted, a little a bit abashed. I looked straight into her eyes and smiled. "I'm finally marrying you."

She let out a chuckle. "When did you start being so cheesy!" She joked.

I smiled. "Hey! I'm being serious here." I said, trying to act offended but failing miserably.

She rolled her eyes and looked back to me, grinning. "I love you." She mouthed.

"I love you more." I mouthed back, pulling her closer to me. "So much more than you think." I whispered before finally kissing her.

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_author's note: Sorry guys if the pacing is fast. I guess, I was trying to end this as fast as I could. Hopefully, the next chapter will be better. _


	18. Chapter 18

**Fast update. Wow. :))) Had time to spare I guess.**

**Anyway hope you guys like this chapter! Dum dum dum dum. Hopefully. **

**Please review if you have time! I like reading your reviews :).**

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-Maxon's POV-

"Good morning." America smiled, her eyes still drowsy.

"Morning, sweetheart." I replied sweetly. Even though a month has already passed since we got married, I still find everything surreal. Sometimes I fear that everything was just a dream or an illusion I made up ever since the day she left, but then when I feel her; when I touch her and she touches me, I know everything is real.

It hasn't been an easy road for us, most especially after the marriage. Even though many of the people adore America it still wasn't enough to explain the turn of events. It took me sleepless nights and a lot of stress to reach out, explain and make them understand the whys and hows without revealing anything confidential. America tried helping out, which I also tried to stop but then, well, she's America. She takes no for an answer.

"hmm…" She hummed, stretching her body. I couldn't help but look at her stomach. It has grown so much in the course of a month. It amazes me how a woman's body could change so drastically. Just 4 months and a week ago, her stomach was flat but now, it's bulging out.

I placed my right hand on her stomach and caressed it. "Good morning to you too, little one. Are you hungry? Daddy will make it himself for you if you want." I said, a smile creeping out in between my words. I then looked back to America who in exchange was smiling back at me.

"I'm afraid you're more excited for this baby than I am." She teased. "And no. You better stay out of the kitchen! Remember just a week ago, you almost put the kitchen on fire!" She exclaimed, and then laughed heartily.

I rolled my eyes and gave out a faint grumble. "It was an accident AND you are exaggerating it. I didn't 'almost put the kitchen on fire.'"

"Oh Maxon, you certainly did." She chuckled. She then sat up and moved to the edge of the bed. I decided to crawl towards her and pull her closer to me.

"Hey, I'm not yet done with you." I said, acting like a kid. I heard her chuckle and afterwards she turned her head to face me.

"Oh baby Maxon." She said, cupping my face with her hands. "Mommy will be late for Dr. Matthew's check-up if we don't get up now."

"Ok! Ok! You win." I laughed. "But seriously you have to stop using that voice on me. It's driving me crazy!" I added, waving my hands for emphasis.

She jokingly punched me on my arm. "Stop acting like you hate it. I know you like it when I use that voice."

"No, I don't" I quickly defended, which in reply she looked at me in disbelief, her eyebrows raised more than the usual. I gave out a shrug before finally admitting in defeat. "Well, ok. Maybe a little bit." And then gave her the 'happy now?' look.

She rolled her eyes at me and then stood up, brushed her hair and tied it in a ponytail. "Come on, we're really going to be late for the check-up."

"Alright, getting up as fast as I can." I replied nonchalantly. In reality, I was nervous. I was always nervous whenever we had to go to Dr. Matthew every week for her check-up. I remember the night after the wedding, it was the first time we told him about America's pregnancy. He quickly talked about abortion procedures we might want. America looked at him and me in horror. I cut him through explaining that we wouldn't want any abortions. At first he looked at me in disapproval and disappointment but we eventually convinced him to help us out. After some talk, Dr. Matthew and I then decided to have a small fully equipped medical room built inside the palace so that if anything happens, we can immediately get America her medical needs. Even amidst all the preparations I recall him telling me that he still cannot assure that America and the baby will survive and that the statistics he gave to her still stands true.

"Earth to, Maxon." America said, breaking me from my chain of thoughts.

"Oh, hey." I chuckled, trying to mask my nervousness.

"Sometimes, I think you're more moody than the pregnant me." She joked.

"I am not." I laughed, finally standing up from bed.

After a few minutes of preparing we headed out of our bed chamber and into the kitchen to grab something to eat. Afterwards, we walked slowly towards the clinic-slash-medical-room.

* * *

-America's POV-

'Here we go again.' I thought to myself. I didn't want to show Maxon that I was nervous which was why I kept on joking around as we went towards the clinic. As I could recall our visits with Dr. Matthew, he always started with "Are you really sure you want to push this through?" and then Maxon would be the one to reply "Certainly."

I wish Dr. Matthew would just get fed up asking that question. 'Doesn't he realize I'll never agree to abort my baby?' I thought angrily.

"Hey, sweetheart, we're already here." Maxon said, looking into my eyes as if trying to decipher my emotions. "You ready?"

I simply nodded and then looked ahead. I could feel him further tighten his right hand's grip to my left which in reply, I squeezed back. I heard him say "It's going to be ok." Before finally leading us in.

The room was sickeningly bright. It smelled like disinfectants which made my stomach churn. Dr. Matthew was sitting on his desk, writing something. Maxon decided to clear his throat, catching Dr. Matthew's attention. He looked at the both of us and signalled us to sit down at the chairs in front of him.

"Are you sure you want to push this through?" he asked once again. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes on him.

"Certainly." Maxon replied, his smile evidently forced.

Dr. Matthew then took his spectacles off before continuing any further. "Well, based on our findings, America is doing well for her condition. Meaning, normally I wouldn't consider these findings..." Showing us some papers with numbers and graphs, which in all honesty, I don't understand. "OK but considering her conditions." He said, pointing his pen at me. "It's the most 'ok' findings we can have."

"So is that good?" I asked stupidly. 'Why do you have to ask, America.' I screamed to myself.

He gave out a sigh before replying. "As I said, based on your condition. It's the best result we could have."

"When can we know the gender of the baby?" Maxon asked, looking at me and then to Dr. Matthew.

"In 3 weeks we'll know." He replied.

"In 3 weeks." I whispered. It didn't show but deep inside I was very ecstatic.

Maxon squeezed my hands and looked at me. "Yeah. I'm excited."

We both laughed and then remembered Dr. Matthew was still in front of us.

"Kids, these days." He said, which made both Maxon and me blush. "Well, let's proceed to the check-up. I know you want to get out of here as soon as possible; as much as I do." He added which made the three of us laugh.

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**After 3 weeks**

-Still America's POV-

"You're here early." Dr. Matthew said, and then looked at the calendar. "Oh that's why." He grinned at us. "Excited to know the gender?"

"Very." Maxon replied, grinning widely. I couldn't help but feel all warm inside. Maxon has been supportive all throughout my pregnancy just as he promised to. Sometimes, I think he's more excited for the baby than I am, which is ridiculous. I remember catching him adding more toys in the nursery room. "You know our baby can't play with those until after a year." I teased. He then gave me that I-can't-help-it shrug, which I find really adorable.

"Well, let's go inside the check-up room then." Dr. Matthew said while leading us into the room.

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"It's a boy?" Maxon rhetorically asked out of excitement.

"Just as I said, it's a boy." Dr. Matthew chuckled. "Don't you believe the doctor?" He added.

"I do." Maxon laughed. "I'm just. I don't know. It's just really amazing." He said and then looked at me. "Well, I don't mind if our baby was a girl. I'm just so happy to know a little more about our baby."

"I understand." I smiled at him. "I actually feel the same way." I laughed. He squeezed my hand and then pulled me closer, kissing me faintly on the lips.

"Thank you." He said.

"For what?" I chuckled, placing my hands on his shoulders.

"For making me a dad." He replied, grinning widely. "For everything."

I waved my hands. "You adore me too much." I teased.

"I do." He said, while looking straight into my eyes and smiling.

We were about to kiss each other when we heard Dr. Matthew clear his throat. "I'm really happy for you two but can you do that somewhere more… uhm… appropriate?"

We both blushed crimson and distanced ourselves a bit but still held onto each other's hands.

"Thank you, Dr. Matthew." Maxon finally said after some moment of silence.

"Yeah. Thank you so much. This wouldn't be possible without you." I added.

Dr. Matthew shook his head. "Nonsense. I was against all of these in the start."

"But you still helped us out, so thank you." I reasoned.

"You're welcome, I guess?" He replied which made us all laugh.

As we were about to head out, Dr. Matthew gave us one last reminder that he always says to us. "Make sure she doesn't do anything strenuous, ok?" well, actually more to Maxon.

Maxon rolled his eyes jokingly and nodded before we finally headed out.

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For two whole days, Maxon couldn't help but boast around about the news. I thought he was already over on the third day but I was so wrong.

"Are you kidding me?" I said as I looked at the nursery room. From plain beige walls, they were now painted blue. The décor was changed, the curtain was changed, the crib was changed and even the flooring was changed. It's more like a game of spot-what-didn't-change. "This is too much, Maxon." I looked at him disapprovingly.

He scratched the back of his head and looked back at me, guiltily. "I guess, I went a little bit overboard."

"A litte bit?" I raised my eyebrows.

He gave me again that I-can't-help-it shrug. "I'm just really excited that I'm going to be a father."

I chuckled and then kissed him lightly on his cheek, "I know."

He grinned at me and pulled me in for a kiss. Even though we've kissed a lot I could never get tired of it. I was about to deepen the kiss more when I felt something kick. I immediately broke the kiss which made Maxon look at me in disappointment.

"The baby, Maxon." I explained.

"What about the baby?" He asked.

"He's moving." I said, grabbing his hands and placing it on top of my stomach.

Maxon's eyes grew in astonishment. "He is." He then knelt and placed his head on my stomach.

"What are you doing?" I laughed.

"Feeling him."

"With your head?"

"And hearing him move." He added. Even though I couldn't see him, I knew he was rolling his eyes at me. "I think he's going to be like you."

"How so?" I asked.

"He likes to kick." He chuckled.

"And your point?" I said, trying to act annoyed.

"He's going to be a fighter like you." He looked up, so that our eyes would meet. "His going to be brave, smart and amazing just like you."

I was about to reply when we heard the alarms. "The southerners." I whispered and looked at Maxon.

"We need to go to the safe rooms." He said grabbing onto my hands and leading us out of the room.

We were already half-way near the safe rooms when we came across a rebel. "Shit" I heard Maxon hiss, he looked at me. "We need to head that way, America." He whispered pointing at one of the doors leading into the gardens. "It's another way into the safe rooms but we have to be quick."

"Maxon, I can't." my voice trembling, as I shook my head.

Maxon looked down for a moment, thinking, before looking at me again. "You're right. I'll distract the rebel while you head straight to the safe rooms, just like how we previously planned. Whatever happens, don't look back and don't stop. Are we clear?"

"No. What if something bad happens to you?" I argued, tears starting to form on my eyes. "We can't separate."

"We have no other choice, America." He said sadly, cupping my face with his hands and wiping my tears away.

"We have." I said looking at him seriously. "Let's head outside just as you proposed earlier." I said pointing to the garden.

"America—"before he could say anything further I grabbed his right hand and started walking briskly towards the doors that lead into the gardens.

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-Maxon's POV-

We somehow were able to get into one of the safe rooms. I breathed in and out, trying to catch my breath up from all the walking we did. I then turned on the lights and walked towards America, who was currently sitting on a chair across the room.

"Hey." I said, sitting beside her. She didn't reply, instead I heard her whimper. "Sweetheart?" I said, my voice laced with worry and panic. I immediately stood up and scanned her body for any signs of injury.

"It hurts." America cried out, holding onto her stomach.

I looked down, as my blood ran cold. "America, you're _bleeding_."


	19. Chapter 19

**So. I was gone for a long time. At first it was because I had a lot of things to do but eventually I realized I lost the passion to continue writing this. I'm deeply sorry. I know how it feels like to read something and then realize that the author discontinued it. Not sure if I'll be updating, if I will, it would probably take a long time.**

**For those who are interested in continuing this story please PM me. **

**a very short update**

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"America, you're bleeding." I heard Maxon say in horror.

I forced myself to open my eyes and looked down, and just as he stated I was bleeding pretty bad. "No." I choked. I looked straight into Maxon's eyes, pleading-asking him to do something. Without a word, he lifted me up.

"Where are we going?" I asked, wrapping my arms around his neck; my head dizzy.

"To the clinic." He replied, his voice somewhat strained.

"But the rebels—" I slurred feeling lightheaded.

"I know."

"But—" The door opened and it was bright.

I blacked out after that.

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Voices. I was hearing voices. One was shouting and the other one holding back.

"What do you mean you can't do it?" I heard one shouting. I tried opening my eyes but they felt heavy.

'Where am I?' I wondered.

"As I said, you only have two options." The other voice said firmly.

"What kind of options are those?! How do you expect me to choose?!" The shouting one replied, his voice filled with frustration.

"There's no other option, your highness."

"You're kidding me?" He said in disbelief. "I can't. Why do I have to choose between them? Why can't I have both?" He continued, his voice almost like a choke.

Maxon? He sounded like my Maxon. I forced my eyes to open and saw him. His clothes were covered in blood, his hair was disheveled, his face worn out, but he was still beautiful; He was still my Maxon. "Maxon." I said weakly, calling out to him.

He froze for a second, somewhat shocked. "America?" He said, pausing, as if he was confirming that he really heard me speak. He ran towards me and kissed me on the forehead. I could feel his lips trembling, and tears dampening my hair. 'Why is he crying?' I thought. I lifted my hands weakly to his face, moving him slightly away so that we were facing each other. And when I looked into his hazel eyes, I saw them. They were filled with pain, confusion, dejection and anguish, and I was pulled back into reality.

"My baby?" I asked but he didn't reply. I looked at the other person, who was Doctor Matthew, my eyes pleading for an answer but at the same dreading to learn about it.

"You still have the baby." He said in hesitation.

I was about to breath out a sigh of relief when I felt a sharp pain on my abdominal area. I cried out and whimpered. "It hurts." I cried again, holding onto my stomach.

"We don't have much time. You have to make a decision NOW." Doctor Matthew shouted to Maxon, shoving some papers and a pen into his hands.

Even though I was in such excruciating pain, I shifted my head, facing Maxon. "What does Doctor Matthew mean, Maxon?"

He looked at me, our eyes locked. And then I knew. I knew what it was. "No." I cried, shaking my head in utter disagreement.

"We-" He closed his eyes. "There's no other option."

I let myself despair. "No. no. no." I cried. "This can't be happening! Why now?!" I asked, my voice laced with venom.

"I'm deeply sorry, My Queen." Doctor Matthew said in sorrow. "We— we can't save both of you."

I closed my eyes, trying to calm the storm inside of me.

"It's going to be ok, America." Maxon tried to comfort me. "I'll—"

"YOU'LL WHAT MAXON?!" I shouted in disbelief. "You're king but you can't do anything about this!" I knew he was hurt about what I said, but the pain I'm feeling right now, both physically and emotionally, are heavens apart from his. "I can't do anything about this. We both can't."

I took his right hand with mine and squeezed it. "Look at me, Maxon." I said softly and he did. "Promise me one thing."

"Anything." He whispered, squeezing my hand back.

"Promise me that you'll save the baby."

"America-" before he could reply another shot of pain ran through my body making me tear up and shriek.

"Promise me, Maxon." I said with the last bit of strength I could master and looked into his eyes, pleading as my whole body gave out.

He bit his lips and closed his eyes. I knew it was too much for anyone to make a choice. I knew he was also in so much pain but I just can't. I don't want to understand.

"I'm sorry, America." He looked at me and then to the papers at his left hand; finally signing them. "I'm so sorry."

And then I knew. I knew what choice he made and I hated him for the first time.


	20. Chapter 20

**It's been so long since I last wrote chapter 19! I never thought that I'd continue writing this story but I did. I'm kind of rusty though since it's been so long since I wrote something. :)) Anyway, CatherineAmes actually wrote a continuation from where I left off last time. Check hers out if you can! :) **

**Hopefully you'll like this chapter and fingers crossed: I hope I finish this story before Christmas break ends.**

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-America's POV-

He was beautiful. His tiny fingers curled into the palm of his hands and his coppery blonde hair waved softly on my shoulders as I carried him in my arms. As early as now, I could tell he was so much like his father. The only things different were his pale complexion and his piercing deep blue eyes. I knew everything I did was worth it. He was my angel— "my little Maxon. " I whispered and giggled after. And somehow for the faintest second I could swear he was also smiling.

"Yes my dear?" Maxon whispered back, wrapping an arm around my waist. I could feel his smile as he kissed the back of my neck. I shivered at his touch and so I twisted my head so that I could give him a peck on the lips.

"Sorry to tell you but I wasn't talking to you." I teased.

He rolled his eyes at me and hugged me tightly. "You said my name, my dear."

Now it was my turn to roll my eyes at him. "I was talking to the baby." I said in-a-matter-of-fact manner.

"So?" He said smugly.

I looked at him weirdly. "So, I wasn't talking to you." I chuckled. "Weird-o."

"Well earlier you said our baby was your little Maxon, so that makes him a 'weird-o' also?" He smirked.

My eyes grew big in irritation and amusement at the same time. That's Maxon to me. Sometimes I feel like I've been actually taking care of a child ever since I met him. "WHAT? NO! Aghh so you were actually…" Before I could finish my sentence the alarms went on.

"The rebels!" I panicked. Somehow, I felt like this has happened before, I just can't pinpoint when it was.

"Calm down America, it's going to be ok." Maxon comforted me. He stood up from the bed and peeked out of the room. "Looks like they haven't infiltrated the inner part of the palace yet. We should hurry into the safe rooms."

I watched him put on a robe for a few seconds before I snapped back from my trance. I quickly put on my robe and carried our baby into my hands. As we headed towards the safe rooms a rebel came into view.

"What do we do?" I said shakily as I embraced our child a little bit tighter.

He looked at me, his eyes telling me that there wasn't any other option. "There's no other choice but to take a detour...or do you want me to distract the rebel while you both go to the safe rooms?"

"No! Never. Let's—just take the detour" I said unsure. I felt like if we separated something would go wrong. That I'd lose him. I can't bear to think that I'll lose Maxon. 'This really feels like a deja vu' I suddenly thought.

Brushing it away, I followed Maxon's lead as he exited the hallways and entered into the gardens. As we neared the safe rooms a sudden shot of pain coursed through my abdomen and spread throughout my body. I fell down in effect. My motherly instincts kicked in so I shielded the baby as we hit bottom.

"America!" I heard Maxon's voice shout in horror while he ran towards me.

"Tha baby." I let out.

"What baby?" He asked in panic and bewilderment.

"Our baby! For god's sake, Maxon, our baby of course!" I replied angrily. I looked down to see if our baby was ok but he was nowhere in sight. "The baby!" I looked at Maxon, my eyes frightened.

Maxon just stared at me as if I was insane. "America, stop joking around. We don't have a baby."

"WE DO!" I shouted. 'What the hell is wrong with Maxon!' I screamed inside.

He shook his head and signed as if this has already happened before. He looked into my eyes, his eyes telling me to drop the conversion earlier and very calmly he said "Take deep breath, America." And so I did. "Let's get into a safe room first, ok?"

"WHAT ABOUT OUR BABY?!" I exasperated.

"There is no baby." He replied stiffly.

"What are you talking about?!" I shouted. "He was with us earlier in bed! How can you say that?" tears cascaded down my cheeks.

"Drop it, America. Stop talking nonsense." he said. I could sense a hint of authority and annoyance in his voice which fueled my anger even more.

"What is wrong with you?!" I shouted. I stood up from the ground. My body was still aching from the pain I felt earlier but I couldn't care. "I'm going to look for him." I said firmly.

I heard him call for me but I just continued on staggering away. Halfway through I suddenly felt something push me. When I opened my eyes I was in a dark place, like an abyss. I suddenly heard someone crying and I thought of our baby. "The baby." I muttered. I stood up and started walking again, searching for the source of the crying. And then I saw him, laying a few meters away. I ran towards him and carried him into my arms. "Don't cry. Mommy's here." I cooed, rocking him gently in my arms.

He looked at me, smiling and I couldn't help but smile back but then it became dark again. I couldn't see anything. I held my baby closer. Then in a few seconds the light came back and now he started crying. The crying got louder and louder; and then there was blood. A lot of blood. Maxon then appeared before me, tears rolling down his face, his body shaking. I looked at his hands, and it was covered in blood. I looked at myself, and I saw that I was bathed in IT.

"I'm so sorry America." He said looking away from me guiltily. "I'm so sorry."

I shrieked in terror.

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I opened my eyes. It was morning. I was inside a room. I could hear a beeping sound. There was a dextrose attached to me. I pulled myself up from the bed and looked around. No one was inside the room.

I was in a daze for a while before I remembered what happened last time. I quickly removed the comforter from my body and looked down to my stomach as my hands tried to feel the bump that was supposed to be there. "My baby. My baby. My baby." I cried, still searching for him. "WHERE'S MY BABY!" I screamed, my face showing anguish.

Nurses flooded into the room. "She woke up." I heard someone say.

"She's disoriented." said another. "What should we do?"

"Where's my baby?" I asked, my voice low, desperate, and shaking.

"My Queen, please calm down." said the blonde nurse.

I was furious. "Calm down?! CALM DOWN? How do you expect me to calm down when I don't even know what happened to my baby?!" I shouted. I tried to get up but they pushed me down. I struggled to get out from their grasps when Doctor. Matthew and Maxon came in.

"Let her go." Maxon said firmly. I could sense a hint of anger from his tone.

"We're deeply sorry, your Highness." They replied in unison, releasing me from their hold.

I looked at Maxon, my eyes asking. "The baby?" He looked at Doctor Matthew hesitantly and Doctor Matthew nodded in return. He combed his right hand through his hair before looking at me. Clearing his throat he said. "America—"

Without hearing it, I knew. Both my heart and stomach plummeted down. "No... no. no. no. NO!" I cried. "He's just in some other room, am I right?" It was a stupid question to ask when I already know the answer but I just couldn't accept it. "He's here. I know it." I lied to myself.

Maxon looked at me, heartbroken. I could see tears forming in his eyes. Shaking his head while his voice trembled he replied "He— he didn't make it."

"You're lying!" I sobbed. "Stop lying." I cried for what seemed like an eternity when I thought of a ludicrous idea. "This is just another dream." I said to myself. "Yes. I just need to wake up." I convinced myself. "I need to wake up." I choked, looking up to Maxon.

I could feel my whole body shaking as I wailed. I felt Maxon embrace me and I embraced him back. "Our baby… our baby." I cried, burying my face on his chest.

"I'm sorry, America." I heard him say guiltily. I then remembered. I remembered what HE DID and all the love I've ever felt for him turned into hate. I pushed him as hard as I can.

"Don't touch me!" I hissed. "Don't you ever touch me!" I said louder, my eyes squinting in rage. He looked like a kicked puppy and for the briefest second I wanted to forgive him but the memory of what he did was still fresh from my mind. "I just… I can't look at you now. Not with what you did." I closed my eyes and breathed out.

"America-"

"Maxon, please! Just give me some time." I pleaded. "I can't help but hate you right now." I finished my voice laced with venom.

He was hurt. It was painted all over him but I just can't forgive him. Not now. Maybe not ever. I could hear him breathe heavily as if he was trying to stop his emotions from pouring out. He looked into my eyes, and I saw a storm in his. "I love you, America. I promised to protect both of you but I couldn't. I failed at the moment you needed me most. I understand how you feel." It felt like he was almost talking to himself; like he had already said these lines over and over. "I hate myself also." He let out and looked away from me.

Why is this happening to the both of us? I want to tell him that I love him. That he was stupid for hating himself. That he was the most wonderful person I've ever met… but I can't because I always go back to that day in the clinic when he made the choice and I can't forgive him.

"But—" He looked at me hesitantly and I looked back. "If I was given the chance again to choose… I'd still choose you, America. I'm sorry."

I bit my lip and tasted metal. "Get out, Maxon."


	21. Chapter 21

**New chapter here! :)) Uhm... so some of you guys might have been confused by the previous chapter so I would just like to make it clear that the first half of it was just a dream of America. Sorry if it had confused you guys :(, not really at my best when I created it.**

**Moving on... I'm hope you like this one! AND Advance Happy New Year! Please review/favorite/follow if you can :D**

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-America's POV-

The weeks had passed by like a haze to me. Today was the day that I will finally be released from the confinement of the clinic and back into the palace. A part of me was relieved to know that I won't be seeing again the bleached white walls and sickening hospital smell of the room I was situated in but at the same time I felt horrified by the idea that I will be back into the main palace again where I would see_ him_.

I was still not ready. That was what I am sure of. Even though he had kept his promise of not showing himself again to me while I was still confined in the clinic, it was still not enough. It's as if no matter how much time had passed, the wounds that were inflicted on me won't ever heal. I realized that there are just wounds that were cut too deep, feelings that were just too strong and, memories that were too engraved, that time, no matter how long, could never mend.

The click of the door opening had cut me from my train of thoughts. I gazed out to the window where I could see the landscape of the other side of the palace, not bothering to greet whoever entered the room.

"Queen America." Doctor Matthew called but I still didn't bother to acknowledge his presence nor showed interest in what he was about to tell me. I heard him clear his throat which he obviously did to get my attention, and so, just to not be too rude, I obliged to set my empty eyes at him.

As he held onto his clipboard and scribbled on the papers, he stated "The recent checkups we made showed that your condition have become stable and consistent, thus, it has come to our decision that you are already perfectly fit to be discharged."

I just hummed in response, not really absorbing what he had said to me.

"Queen—"

"I heard you." I cut him out, my voice sounding a bit more annoyed than what I had meant to. "I already know. I overheard the nurses outside talk about it earlier." I added in a matter-of-fact manner.

I heard him sigh out of frustration and exhaustion. "I should be stricter with the mouth of those gossipers." He grumbled and continued. "That is not all though."

I looked at him, my attention caught. He eyed me warily as if trying to find the proper words to utter before finally spelling it out to me. He cleared his throat and adjusted his spectacles before finally mastering to speak again. "I recommend that—No I meant, I adhere that you should take counselling sessions. I already scheduled your counselling sessions,as to not trouble your other duties as a queen, all I need now is your approval and signature."

I glared at him, biting my lower lip till I could feel it sting. "That is not needed." I gritted through my teeth."I have not become crazy. AND I am pretty sure I have my emotions in check and in control." I hissed. How dare they dictate what I need or not.

"We would never think that you were crazy, my Queen. Being a doctor, my primary concern is to make sure of your well-being. May it be physically, psychologically, emotionally, or mentally. I may not have gone through what you had gone through, but I know well enough that losing a child would have some grievous effect on you, which is why I adhere that you accept the counseling sessions." He explained.

I pursed my lips in raged as I inhaled a lungful of air. "I would never EVER console my feelings and emotions to a stranger." I spat. "I know myself enough and much better than you, to say that I do not need such."

"As I said—"

"Not a word about it." I commanded, feeling a bit foreign with the authoritative tone I gave out. "My decision is final."

Shrugging in defeat he continued writing on the paper before handing them out to me. "Very well, but if ever you change your mind you can just fill these out and submit it here in the clinic."

Silently, I took the papers and set them aside the table. "...Won't ever happen." I mumbled incoherently.

"Moving on.." He sighed. "I have already informed your Highness about your release. After you sign these papers, you can start preparing. He will be fetching you 40 minutes from now."

I tensed at the idea that I'll be seeing_ him _again. What will I do? How will I respond when I see him? Can I honestly face him? These questions plagued my mind before Doctor Matthew brought me back to reality.

"Did you hear what I just said?" He questioned.

I nodded in response and went back to bed, pulling the bed sheets up to my shoulders.

"Queen America—"

"I am not deaf. I understood everything. I'm tired and I want to rest. Won't you leave me alone?" I ended with a rhetorical question.

"Very well then, I'd like you to remember that Maxon will be picking you up in 40 mins." He said as he closed the door in a silent click.

When I couldn't hear any footsteps in the hallway anymore, I got up from my bed and looked out of the window once again. It was a bright day. 'too bright' I thought. I hated beautiful days ever since that day happened. Deep within me, the idea that days could pass like this, as if nothing had happened, sickens me to the pit of my stomach. How can the world be so normal? And sometimes beautiful? How can it go on when I've lost my baby? When people have died? When tragedy has befallen on someone? I clenched my hands in anger. I could feel myself shaking as the questions kept on pouring out. "Why? Why is the world so cruel? Why have I become like this?" I gritted through my teeth, tears started dampening my cheeks.

"I'm so tired. So tired." I sat at the edge of my bed, bringing my hands to my face as I let the tears fall down. "I don't want to fight anymore." I cried, a childlike voice coming out from me.

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-Maxon's POV-

I was finally going to see her, my beloved America. Nervousness then hit me. I could feel my hands get sweaty. 'What do I do? How will I talk to her? Is she ready to see me? What do I do when she's not? What do I do when she says she hates me? when she says that she doesn't want to see me anymore?' Such questions have been plaguing my mind as I walked through the corridors of the palace. Without realizing, my feet have brought me straight to the palace wing where the clinic resides. I looked down at my watch, seeing that I was far too early from the suggested time.

Doctor Matthew came out of America's room and headed towards his office.

"Your highness." A group of nurses nodded and I smiled at them in return. I watched them as they went on their way before finally moving towards America's room.

I was about to open the door when I heard someone sobbing from the other side of the door.

_"Why? Why is the world so cruel? Why have I become like this?"_

_"I'm so tired. So tired."_

_"I don't want to fight anymore."_

I felt my heart drop and my stomach churn. I felt sick to the pit of my stomach. She didn't deserve this and it was all my fault. I promised her that I would protect them but in the end, I was too pathetic to do so. I wasn't able to protect anyone, even the people that truly mattered in my life. I loved her and our baby… even until now. How could a father not grieve for his child? I was also like her, broken and in despair but as a king I was not permitted to show these emotions. I was trained to conceal and put on a mask on anything and everything that will show weakness.

I steadied my breathing, masking my emotions once again before entering the room. I opened and closed the door behind as quietly as possible. I looked at her form as she curled herself in bed. She was asleep, tear marks still fresh on her cheeks. I silently went to her side and gently sat on the edge of the bed as to not wake her up. She was healthier now compared to before, but still too thin. She has become very fragile in my eyes, as if she would break at any given moment.

Moving my hand towards her face, I gently brushed off the strands of hair that fell off. Satisfied that no hair was covering her face anymore I went forward to give her a subtle kiss on her forehead. Afterwards, I stood up and went to get a chair across the room and placed it parallel to the bed. I studied her sleeping form. At least, even just for this moment, she was at peace. When she wakes up I know she'll probably hate to see me. And just the thought of it turns me into stone. After 20 minutes I could feel myself doze off but the slightest shuffle she made woke me up instantly.

"Maxon?" Her voice was music to my ears. It felt like an eternity since she last spoke to me. I've missed how beautiful she makes my name sound like when she says it. I know it's ridiculous, but no matter how many times I hear her voice call my name, it still makes my heart flutter and my stomach knot in so many ways.

I shifted my eyes towards her face, meeting her piercing blue eyes. One of my worst predictions came to life, making me regret looking back at her. I saw horror and bewilderment in her eyes. Masking the hurt and stabbing pain I felt, I smiled weakly at her. "Hey, you woke up."

Ignoring what I said she sat up from bed. "What are you doing here?" She asked in bewilderment, looking at the clock plastered on the wall.

"I came to fetch you remember?" I responded, pushing back whatever emotion that dared to resurface.

"You're 20 mins too early." She said with a hint of frustration and annoyance.

I laughed awkwardly and faked to look at my wristwatch. "Oh yeah. My meeting ended early so I thought that I'd get here early…" She'd probably kill me if she knew I was far earlier than what she thought.

Grumbling, she got up from bed. "I need to change."

"Sure." I replied, not knowing what to say after.

She shot me a glare before speaking. "You're supposed to get out now."

I stood stupidly, blushing from my oblivion. "I'll get out now." I mumbled as I headed out and closed the door behind. 'Maxon, how stupid can you get?' I thought to myself. 'but then again, I've seen her naked body so many times.' What the hell is wrong with me? "Stop thinking about. Stop thinking about it." I chanted.

I heard the door open and my breath was taken away. America wore the pants I gave her long ago, pairing them with some knitted sweater. "Beautiful." I whispered.

"What were you saying?" She asked while tying her hair into a messy bun.

"Nothing." I replied and turned my head away from her, hiding the slightest tint on my cheeks. "Let's go to Dr. Matthew so that we can finally leave."

She gave out a shrug and started heading towards Dr. Matthew's office. I ran to her side as dead silence accompanied us until we got there.

I signed some papers, I could feel the heavy gaze of Dr. Matthew's inquisitive eyes pry on me and America. After finishing whatever business we had with the clinic, I gave him a weak smile and waved our farewells in which America seemed disinterested in. Our journey to the main palace was painstakingly long and suffocating, so far from what I wished it had been. Even though she was right beside me, she felt so distant from me. 'This is better than her expression earlier though.' I thought and sighed afterwards.

As we reached her room I studied her. She was here but I knew she was else where. This was her way of coping and tolerating my presence. It hurt, but I knew it was my fault. This was my punishment... I just hoped that someday or at some time, she'd go back to me again.

"We're here." I said, finally breaking the deafening silence. I opened the door for her and she went in mumbling what seemed to be a thank you.

"I should go then." My voice, unsure. She nodded in response. "I'll see you at dinner?" I asked, sounding a bit more excited than what I had intended to.

She seemed to hesitate before nodding in response. I closed the door for her and just stood there for a while. I went closer and placed my head against a door panel. "I love you." I whispered before finally leaving.

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_SOOO...Can I be honest with you guys? Somehow I'm lost with what I want to do with this story. At first I had a clear picture of what I had wanted it to be, but then I took a turn, then another turn until I have no idea how I'll go about this story anymore. I'm just praying that I'll be able to end this story._


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